The True George Washington [10th Ed.]Ford, Paul Leicester
History
The True George Washington [10th Ed.]
Ford, Paul Leicester
Generals -- United States -- Biography; Presidents -- United States -- Biography; Washington, George, 1732-1799
Washington certainly did enjoy a joke. Nelly Custis said, “I have
sometimes made him laugh most heartily from sympathy with my joyous and
extravagant spirits,” and many other instances of his laughing are
recorded. He himself wrote in 1775 concerning the running away of some
British soldiers, “we laugh at his idea of chasing the Royal Fusileers
with the stores. Does he consider them as inanimate, or as treasure?”
When the British in Boston sent out a bundle of the king’s speech,
“farcical enough, we gave great joy to them, (the red coats I mean),
without knowing or intending it; for on that day, the day which gave
being to the new army, (but before the proclamation came to hand,) we
had hoisted the union flag in compliment to the United Colonies. But,
behold, it was received in Boston as a token of the deep impression the
speech had made upon us, and as a signal of submission.”
At times Washington would joke himself, though it was always somewhat
labored, as in the case of the Jack already cited. “Without a coinage,”
he wrote, “or unless a stop can be put to the cutting and clipping of
money, our dollars, pistareens, &c., will be converted, as Teague says,
into _five_ quarters.” When the Democrats were charging the Federalists
with having stolen from the treasury, he wrote to a Cabinet official,
“and pray, my good sir, what part of the $800.000 have come to your
share? As you are high in Office, I hope you did not disgrace yourself
in the acceptance of a paltry bribe—a $100.000 perhaps.” He once even
attempted a pun, by writing, “our enterprise will be ruined, and we
shall be stopped at the Laurel Hill this winter; but not to gather
laurels, (except of the kind that covers the mountains).”
Probably the neatest turn was his course on one occasion with General
Tryon, who sent him some British proclamations with the request, “that
through your means, the officers and men under your command may be
acquainted with their contents.” Washington promptly replied that he
had given them “free currency among the officers and men under my
command,” and enclosed to Tryon a lot of the counter-proclamation,
asking him to “be instrumental in communicating its contents, so far as
it may be in your power, to the persons who are the objects of its
operation. The benevolent purpose it is intended to answer will I
persuade myself, sufficiently recommend it to your candor.”
To a poetess who had sent him some laudatory verses about himself he
expressed his thanks, and added, “Fiction is to be sure the very life
and Soul of Poetry—all Poets and Poetesses have been indulged in the
free and indisputable use of it, time out of mind. And to oblige you to
make such an excellent Poem on such a subject without any materials but
those of simple reality, would be as cruel as the Edict of Pharoah
which compelled the children of Israel to manufacture Bricks without
the necessary Ingredients.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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