What was Geoffrey to do? He did his best to shut his ears to Miss Anna’s
laugh and her remark, “You perceive it is always a great deal better to
talk things over with me.” It was quite true, though he never would own
it: and to discuss this matter with her was impossible to him. He stood
for a little while by the fire, staring into the mirror, where his own
troubled countenance appeared in the centre of all the little carved
shelves covered with china, which were reflected on every side. He felt
himself, as he had done so many times before, altogether out of place in
the house, where he was sometimes the master and sometimes of less
account than the dog. So far Geoffrey was always the master. His tastes,
his comforts, and even his convenience were the subjects of endless
study. But between his mother’s incapacity for any mental exertion, and
his aunt’s too keen and casuistical intelligence, it often happened that
Geoffrey was driven to the end of his patience, and felt himself no
better than a puppet between them, vainly struggling against Miss Anna’s
false logic and his mother’s shifty feebleness. At these moments a sort
of sickness of despair came over the young man. He thought with longing
of any wild scene of emigrant life, any diggings, or sheep-walks, into
which he could escape, to encounter the grosser elements of life, and be
free of this feminine atmosphere. To plant him here between these two
ladies seemed a freak of fate which was unaccountable. Their motives,
their ideas, were all different from his. Geoffrey stood for a few
minutes staring at himself, thinking what a gloomy ruffian he looked,
and how much out of keeping with all those dainty surroundings; then he
went hastily out, notwithstanding the appeal of both ladies to him. “You
are not going out in the rain, Geoff?” cried his mother; while Miss Anna
bade him recollect that it was past six o’clock. Geoffrey paid no
attention to either. It would be almost a satisfaction, he felt, to make
her wait for her dinner. Not his mother, who cared as little for her
dinner as any woman could do, but Miss Anna, who was _gourmande_, and
could not bear to wait. He was glad, too, of the sting of the rain,
blown in his face as he stepped out from all the comfort and warmth of
the too warm, luxurious house. The chill air and the darkness refreshed
him--they were such a contradiction to all the conditions of his life.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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