"Do you suppose you have to tell me," she asked, "what is lacking in my
life or how hungry I am for it? I knew years ago what it was to love you
... and I've dreamed of it ever since. But all your appeal is to
passion, Stuart--none of it to the sense of fair play. I'm neither
sexless nor nerveless. When I held you off a little while ago, my hands
on your breast could feel the beat of your heart--and the arms that kept
us apart were aching to go round your neck. I've sat back there in the
window of my room night after night and watched you walking in the
pines, and I've wanted to go out and comfort you.... I've been hungry
for the touch of your hand on mine ... for everything that love can
give."
It was difficult for him to stand there under the curb of self-restraint
and listen, but as yet he achieved it. And in the same quiet, yet
thrilling voice she continued: "Your coming here brought a
transformation. The fog lifted and I've been living the life of a
lotus-eater--but now I've got to go back into the fog. Every argument
you've made is an argument I've made to myself--and I know it's just
temptation."
"Don't you see, dearest, that you are utterly deluding yourself?" The
fervency of combat came with his words. "Don't you see that all that is
finest and most vital in you, is that part that's in protest? Don't you
see that you are just reacting in every crisis to the cramped puritanism
you once denounced?"
"Puritanism!" she exclaimed, and the gentle manner of her speech
stiffened suddenly into a timbre more militant.
"Call it what you like. Yes, I _am_ a puritan woman, Stuart, and I thank
God for the heritage--if I am always to have to fight these battles
against passionate rebellion. I know puritanism now for what it is. I
guess Christ might have been called a puritan, when Satan took him up on
the high mountain and offered him the world." She paused only a moment,
then swept on with the fervor of an ultimatum. "And since you choose to
put it that way," she looked at him with eyes full of challenge, "I mean
to stay the puritan woman. You've come with your southern fire and the
voluptuous voice of your southern pleading, to unsettle me and make me
surrender my code. You can't do it, Stuart. I love you, but I can still
fight you! If that's the difference between us--the difference between
puritan and cavalier--there's still a line that mustn't be crossed. To
cross it means war. If you fire on Fort Sumpter, Fort Sumpter can still
fire back."
"How am I firing on Fort Sumpter?" he asked and she quickly responded.
"You're assailing my powers of endurance. You're trying to make me take
the easy course of putting desire above duty. You're trying to make me
forget the ideals of the men at Valley Forge--the things that your
ancestors and mine fought for when they went to war to build a nation:
before they fought each other to disrupt one--loyalty and
steadfastness!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account