The Uncollected Writings of Thomas de Quincey, Vol. 2: With a Preface and Annotations by James HoggDe Quincey, Thomas
General
The Uncollected Writings of Thomas de Quincey, Vol. 2: With a Preface and Annotations by James Hogg
De Quincey, Thomas
English literature
At this moment, however, up came some acquaintances of Mrs.
Sweetbread's, who had ridden out to see the hunt; and, whilst her
attention was for one moment drawn off to them, Mr. Schnackenberger
slipped unobserved into a parlour: it was now half-past ten by the
Forester's clock; and he resolved to wait here until the time fixed by
the princess. Whilst sitting in this situation, he heard in an adjoining
room (separated only by a slight partition) his own name often repeated:
the voice was that of Mr. Von Pilsen; loud laughter followed every
sentence; and on attending more closely, Mr. Schnackenberger perceived
that he was just terminating an account of his own adventures at the
Golden Sow, and of his consequent embroilment with the amorous landlady.
All this, however, our student would have borne with equanimity. But
next followed a disclosure which mortified his vanity in the uttermost
degree. A few words sufficed to unfold to him that Mr. Von Pilsen, in
concert with the waiter of the Double-barrelled Gun and that young
female attendant of the princess, whose kitten had been persecuted by
Juno, had framed the whole plot, and had written the letters which Mr.
Schnackenberger had ascribed to her Highness. He had scarce patience to
hear out the remainder. In some way or other, Von Pilsen had so far
mistaken our hero, as to pronounce him 'chicken-hearted:' and upon this
ground, he invited his whole audience to an evening party at the public
rooms of the Double-barrelled Gun--where he promised to play off Mr.
Schnackenberger as a glorious exhibition for this night only.
Furious with wrath, and moreover anxious to escape before Von Pilsen and
his party should see him, and know that this last forgery no less than
the others had succeeded in duping him into a punctual observance of the
appointment, Mr. Schnackenberger rushed out of the room, seized his
horse's bridle--and was just on the point of mounting, when up came his
female tormentor, Mrs. Sweetbread.
'Come, come, now,' said she, smiling in her most amiable manner; 'we
were both under a mistake yesterday morning: and both of us were too
hasty. The booby of a lad took you to the Gun, when you wanted nothing
but the Sow: you were a little "fresh," and didn't know it; and I
thought you did it on purpose. But I know better now. And here I am to
fetch you back to the Sow: so come along: and we'll forget and forgive
on both sides.'
So saying, she would have taken his arm most lovingly: but Mr.
Schnackenberger stoutly refused. He had nothing to do with her but to
pay his bill; he wanted nothing of her but his back-sword, which he had
left at the Sow; and he made a motion towards his stirrup. But Mrs.
Sweetbread laid her hand upon his arm, and asked him tenderly--if her
person were then so utterly disgusting to him that, upon thus meeting
him again by his own appointment, he had at once forgotten all his
proposals?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account