German fiction -- Translations into English; Germany -- Fiction; Sin -- Fiction
The man had not been in the least like Leo. As far as she could
remember, he had worn a velvet coat like an artist, or something of the
kind. Oh yes, artists, with their wide views and great minds, were the
men who understood the hearts of women, and how to drag them into
eternity. She wasn't sure about the velvet coat after all. But the
woman's white satin dress she remembered distinctly; it had fitted like
gleaming armour over the bust. That wasn't the fashion now, but what
did fashions matter when one was going to die? The only thing that
mattered was to look beautiful in death. And she began to consider what
she should put on. Among her peignoirs and _sautes de lit_, she
possessed one of softest _crêpe de chine_ which fell in straight Greek
folds, and was drawn in above the waist by a golden girdle. She had
ordered it from Paris before her second marriage, and had been keeping
it for some special occasion. This occasion would certainly have
arrived now if Leo had not got hold of the stupid idea that they must
creep out into the night-mists to put an end to themselves.
In any case, she would not forego the pleasure of trying on the
artistic garment. She locked the doors, put shades of pink gauze on the
toilette-table candles, and undressed. As she stood before the glass,
her figure in the graceful Greek draperies illumined seductively by the
subdued purple light, she was ravished by the sight of her own beauty.
He must see her like this. Just for one second, and all thought of
dying would be abandoned. How glad she was that she had extracted that
promise from him at the last, to come and fetch her. When she met him
thus attired, what else could he do but snatch her in his arms, and
instead of dying with her in the gruesome manner that he had proposed,
he would tread again at her side the primrose path of passion, which
Rhaden's jealousy had so hatefully interrupted.
Yes, so she would win him back to her altogether, her big, adoring boy.
But the night that she passed before this contemplated enjoyment was
anything but peaceful. She recalled his face when he had said, "This
time it will be no joke. We shall not drink toothache drops." And even
granted that she could bring him to reason, there was always the vision
of Johanna hovering in the background, eager to shatter their new-found
bliss.
Was there no way out of it? She pondered and pondered till her head
ached, staring into the darkness with wide, anxious eyes. The plan that
she hit on at last did not differ eventually by a hair's breadth from
the one which Leo had rejected as unworthy. She would write to Ulrich
to-morrow and impress on him how Johanna's brain was becoming more
unhinged every day. She would give striking examples of it, pity and
defend the unfortunate creature, hint at a pending catastrophe, and so
prepare his mind for having to deal with the delusions of a mad woman,
if she should really make a betrayal of her secret.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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