Elsie was much startled by this question. She knew what she meant very
well, but she had not intended to betray to her mother, or any one, what
that hidden meaning was, and the words had come to her lips in the tide
of feeling without thought. She gave one hurried glance at her mother’s
face, herself crimson red from chin to brow.
“I was meaning nothing,” she said.
“That is not the way folk look when they mean nothing,” her mother said.
“But it’s true. I meant just nothing, nothing! I meant I would want no
plenishing like Marion. I meant--that you need not take account of me,
or say, as I’ve heard you saying, ‘I must put this by for’--it used
always to be for Marion. You are not to think of me like that,” Elsie
cried.
“And wherefore no? If I were not to think of you like that, I would be
an ill mother: and why you less than another? You are taking no whimsies
into your head, I hope, Elsie--for that is a thing I could not put up
with at all.”
“I have no whimsies in my head, mother,” cried Elsie bending low over
her work.
“You have something in it, whimsey or no,” said her mother severely,
“that is not known to me.”
And there was a little relapse into silence and sewing for both. Elsie’s
breath came quick over her lengthened seam, the needle stumbled in her
hold and pricked her fingers. She cast about all around her desperately
for something to say. Indeed no--she had not meant anything, not
anything that could be taken hold of and discussed: though it was
equally true that she knew what she meant. How to reconcile these
things! but they were both true.
“Mother,” she said, after five dreadful moments of silence, and assuming
a light tone which was very unlike her feelings. “Do you mind you told
me that if there was any way I could make it up to Frank--but now that
he’s to be so well off there will be no need of that any more.”
“Were you ever disposed to make it up to Frank?” her mother said
quickly, taking the girl by surprise.
“I never thought about it--I--might never have had any
occasion--I--don’t know what I could have--done,” Elsie replied,
faltering.
“Because,” said Mrs. Buchanan in the same rapid tone, “it would just be
better than ever now. He will have a very good estate, and he’s a very
nice callant--kind and true, and not so silly as you might expect from
his upbringing. If that was your thought, Elsie, it would be far wiser
than I ever gave you credit for--and your father and me, we would never
have a word but good and blessing to say----”
“Oh, mother,” cried Elsie, “you to say the like of that to me--because a
person was to have a good estate!”
“And wherefore no? A good estate is a very good thing: and plenty of
siller, if it is not the salt of life--oh, my dear, many a time it gives
savour to the dish. Wersh, wersh without it is often the household
bread.”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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