But what I cannot, I am afraid, impart to you is the strange
tranquillity that came softly down into my mind; everything took its
part in this atmosphere of peace. The overgrown terrace, the mellow
brickwork, the bare trees, the tall house, the gentle kindliness of my
host. And then I seemed so far away from the world; there was nothing
in sight but the fallows and the woods, rounded with mist; it seemed at
once the only place in the world, and yet out of it. The old house
stood patiently waiting, serving its quiet ends, growing in beauty
every year, seemingly so unconscious of its grace and charm, and yet,
as it were, glad to be loved. It seemed to give me just the calm, the
tenderness I wanted. To assure me that, whatever pain and humiliation
there were in the world, there was a strong and loving Heart behind. My
host said good-bye to me very kindly, begging me to come again and
bring any one to see the place. "We are very lonely here, and it does
us good to see a stranger."
I rode away, and stopped at a corner where a last view of the house was
possible; it stood regarding me, it seemed, mournfully, and yet with a
solemn welcome from its dark windows. And here was another beautiful
vignette; close to me, by a hedge, stood an old labourer, a fork in one
hand, the other shading his eyes, watching with simple intentness a
flight of wild-duck that was passing overhead, dipping to some
sequestered pool.
I rode away with a quiet hopefulness in my heart. I seemed like a dusty
and weary wayfarer, who has flung off his heated garments and plunged
into the clear waters of comfort; to have drawn near to the heart of
the world; to have had a sight, in the midst of things mutable and
disquieting, of things august and everlasting. At another time I might
have flung myself into busy fancies, imagined a community living an
orderly and peaceful life, full of serene activities, in that still
place; but for once I was content to have seen a dwelling-place,
devised by some busy human brain, that had failed of its purpose, lost
its ancient lords, sunk into a calm decay; to have seen it all caressed
and comforted and embraced by nature, its scars hidden, its grace
replenished, its harshness smoothed away.
Such gentle hours are few; and fewer still the moments of anxiety and
vexation when so direct a message is flashed straight from the Mind of
God into the unquiet human heart; I never doubted that I was led there
by a subtle, delicate, and fatherly tenderness, and shown a thing which
should at once touch my sense of beauty, and then rising, as it were,
and putting the superficial aspect aside, speak with no uncertain voice
of the deep hopes, the everlasting peace on which for a few years the
little restless world of ours is rocked and carried to and fro. . .
.--Ever yours,
T. B.
UPTON,
Nov. 29, 1904.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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