I have had an almost solitary day, except for meals. I like being here
in a way; there is no strain about it. That is the best of
blood-relationship; there is no need to entertain or to be entertained.
My brother-in-law, Charles, is an excellent fellow, full to the brim of
small plans and designs for his parish; my sister is a very simple and
unworldly person, entirely devoted to her husband and children. My
nephews and nieces, four in number, three girls and a boy, do not, I
regret to say, interest me very deeply; they are amiable, healthy
children, with a confined horizon, rather stolid; they never seem to
quarrel or to have any particular preferences. The boy, who is the
youngest, is to come to my house at Upton when he is old enough; but at
present I am simply a good-natured uncle to the children, whose arrival
and whose gifts make a pleasant little excitement. Our talk is purely
local, and I make it my business to be interested. It is all certainly
very restful. Sometimes--as a rule, in fact--when I stay in other
people's houses, I have a sense of effort; I feel dimly that a certain
brightness is expected of me; as I dress in the morning I wonder what
we shall talk about, and what on earth I shall do between breakfast and
lunch. But here I have a fire in my bedroom all day, and for the first
time, I am permitted to smoke there. I read and write all the morning;
I walk, generally alone, in the afternoon. I write before dinner. The
result is that I am perfectly content. I sleep like a top; and I find
myself full of ideas. The comfort of the whole thing is that no one is
afraid that I am not amused, and I myself do not have the uneasy sense
that I am bound, so to speak, to pay for my entertainment by being
brisk, lively, or sympathetic. The immediate consequence is, that I get
as near to all three qualities as I ever get. We simply live our own
lives quietly, in company. My presence gives a little fillip to the
proceedings; and I myself get all the benefit of change of scene,
together with simple unexhausting companionship.
Hark! it is midnight! The soft murmur of bells rises on the clear air,
toppling over in a sweet cascade of sound, bringing hope and peace to
the heart. In the attic above I hear the children moving softly about,
and catch the echo of young voices. They are supposed to be asleep, but
I gather that they have been under a vow to keep awake in turn, the
watcher to rouse the others just before midnight. The bells peal on,
coming in faint gusts of sound, now loud, now low.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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