Fulvia was of those who require that their lives shall be an affirmation
of themselves; and the lack of inner harmony drove her to seek some
outward expression of her ideals. She threw herself with renewed passion
into the political struggle. The best, the only justification of her
power, was to use it boldly, openly, for the good of the people. All the
repressed forces of her nature were poured into this single channel. She
had no desire to conceal her situation, to disguise her influence over
Odo. She wished it rather to be so visible a factor in his relations
with his people that she should come to be regarded as the ultimate
pledge of his good faith. But, like all the casuistical virtues, this
position had the rigidity of something created to fit a special case;
and the result was a fixity of attitude, which spread benumbingly over
her whole nature. She was conscious of the change, yet dared not
struggle against it, since to do so was to confess the weakness of her
case. She had chosen to be regarded as a symbol rather than a woman, and
there were moments when she felt as isolated from life as some marble
allegory in its niche above the market-place.
It was the desire to associate herself with the Duke's public life that
had induced her, after much hesitation, to accept the degree which the
University had conferred on her. She had shared eagerly in the work of
reconstructing the University, and had been the means of drawing to
Pianura several teachers of distinction from Padua and Pavia. It was her
dream to build up a seat of learning which should attract students from
all parts of Italy; and though many young men of good family had
withdrawn from the classes when the Barnabites were dispossessed, she
was confident that they would soon be replaced by scholars from other
states. She was resolved to identify herself openly with the educational
reform which seemed to her one of the most important steps toward civic
emancipation; and she had therefore acceded to the request of the
faculty that, on receiving her degree, she should sustain a thesis
before the University. This ceremony was to take place a few days hence,
on the Duke's birthday; and, as the new charter was to be proclaimed on
the same day, Fulvia had chosen as the subject of her discourse the
Constitution recently promulgated in France.
She pushed aside the bundle of political pamphlets which she had been
studying, and sat looking out at the strip of garden beyond the arches
of the cloister. The narrow horizon bounded by convent walls symbolised
fitly enough the life she had chosen to lead: a life of artificial
restraints and renunciations, passive, conventual almost, in which even
the central point of her love burned, now, with a calm devotional glow.
The door in the cloister opened and the Duke crossed the garden. He
walked slowly, with the listless step she had observed in him of late;
and as he entered she saw that he looked pale and weary.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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