She bore all this well, for a while,--and indeed never ceased to bear
it well, to the eyes of those around her. When Parson John told her
of Walter's hunting, she laughed, and said that she hoped he would
distinguish himself. When her aunt on one occasion congratulated
her, telling her that she had done well and nobly, she bore the
congratulation with a smile and a kind word. But she thought about it
much, and within the chambers of her own bosom there were complaints
made that the play which had been played between him and her during
the last few months should for her have been such a very tragedy,
while for him the matter was no more than a melodrama, touched with
a pleasing melancholy. He had not been made a waif upon the waters
by the misfortune of a few weeks, by the error of a lawyer, by a
mistaken calculation,--not even by the crime of his father. His
manhood was, at any rate, perfect to him. Though he might be a poor
man, he was still a man with his hands free, and with something
before him which he could do. She understood, too, that the rough
work of his life would be such that it would rub away, perhaps too
quickly, the impression of his late love, and enable him hereafter
to love another. But for her,--for her there could be nothing but
memory, regrets, and a life which would simply be a waiting for
death. But she had done nothing wrong,--and she must console herself
with that, if consolation could then be found.
Then there came to her a letter from Mrs. Fenwick which moved her
much. It was the second which she had received from her friend since
she had made it known that she was no longer engaged to her cousin.
In her former letter Mrs. Fenwick had simply expressed her opinion
that Mary had done rightly, and had, at the same time, promised that
she would write again, more at length, when the passing by of a few
weeks should have so far healed the first agony of the wound, as to
make it possible for her to speak of the future. Mary, dreading this
second letter, had done nothing to elicit it; but at last it came.
And as it had some effect on Mary Lowther's future conduct, it shall
be given to the reader:--
Bullhampton Vicarage, March 12, 186--.
DEAREST MARY,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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