The Wanderer; or, Female Difficulties (Volume 2 of 5)Burney, Fanny
History
The Wanderer; or, Female Difficulties (Volume 2 of 5)
Burney, Fanny
France -- History -- Revolution, 1789-1799 -- Refugees -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Refugees -- Fiction; War stories
An impression so potent, made by the no longer doubted, and quick
approximation of that Death, which, in the vigour and pride of Life, and
Health, she had so passionately invoked, forcibly and fearfully affected
Ellis; who uttered a secret prayer, that her own preparations for an
event, which though the most indispensably common, could never cease to
be the most universally tremendous of mortality, might be frequent
enough, and cheerful enough, to take off horrour from its approach,
without substituting presumption.
After a long pause, Elinor opened her eyes; and, in a subdued voice and
manner, that seemed to stifle a struggling sigh, softly said, 'There is
no time, then, it seems, to lose? My short race is already run,--yet
already has been too long! O Harleigh! had I been able to touch your
heart!--'
Tears gushed into her eyes: she dispersed them hastily with her fingers;
and, looking around her with an air of inquietude and shame, said, with
studied composure, 'You have kindly, Mr Naird, offered me your services.
I thankfully accept them. Pursue and find, without delay, Mr Harleigh,
repeat to him what you have just pronounced, and tell him....' She
blushed deeply, sighed; checked herself, and mildly went on, 'This is no
season for pride! Tell him my situation, and that I beg, I entreat, I
conjure, I even implore him to let me once more--' Again she stopt,
almost choaked with repressed emotions; but presently, with a calmer
accent, added, 'Say to him, he will not merely soften, but delight my
last moments, in being then the sole object I shall behold, as, from the
instant that I first saw him, he has been the only one who has engaged
my thoughts:--the imperious, constant master of my mind!'
Mr Naird respectfully accepted the commission; demanding only, in
return, that she would first permit him once more to dress her wound.
This she opposed; though so faintly, that it was evident that she was
more averse to being thought cowardly, or inconsistent, than to stopping
the quicker progress of dissolution. When Mr Naird, therefore
represented, that it was sending him upon a fruitless errand, if she
meant to bleed to death in his absence, she complied. He then enjoined
her to be quiet, and went forth.
With the most perfect stillness she awaited his return; neither speaking
nor moving; and holding her watch in her hand, upon which she fixed her
eyes without intermission; except to observe, from time to time, whether
Ellis were in sight.
When he re-appeared, she changed colour, and covered her face with her
hand; but, soon removing it, and shewing a steady countenance, she
raised her head. When however, she perceived that he was alone; and,
after looking vainly towards the door, found that no one followed, she
tremulously said,
'Will he not, then, come?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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