The Wanderer; or, Female Difficulties (Volume 3 of 5)Burney, Fanny
History
The Wanderer; or, Female Difficulties (Volume 3 of 5)
Burney, Fanny
France -- History -- Revolution, 1789-1799 -- Refugees -- Fiction; Historical fiction; Refugees -- Fiction; War stories
Tears now gushed into her eyes. Ashamed, and angry with herself, she
hastily brushed them off with the back of her hand, and, with forced
vivacity, continued, 'He thinks, perchance, to sicken me into the pining
end of a love-sick consumption? to avert the kindly bowl or dagger, that
cut short human misery, for the languors, the sufferings, and despair of
a loathsome natural death? And for what?--to restore, to preserve me?
No! I have no share in the arrangement; no interest, no advantage from
the plan. Appearances alone are considered; all else is regarded as
immaterial; or sacrificed. And he, Harleigh, the noblest,--the only
noble of men!--can level himself with the narrowest and most illiberal
of his race, to pay coward obeisance to appearances!'
Again she then repeated her personal interrogatories to Juliet; and
demanded whether she should set off immediately for Gretna Green, with
Lord Melbury; or whether she must wait till he should be of age.
'Neither!' Juliet solemnly answered; and frankly recounted her recent
difficulties; and entreated the advice of Elinor for adopting another
plan of life.
Elinor, interrupting her, said, 'Nay, 'twas your own choice, you know,
to live in a garret, and hem pocket-handkerchiefs.'
'Choice, Madam! Alas! deprived of all but personal resource, I fixed
upon a mode of life that promised me, at least, my mental freedom. I was
not then aware how imaginary is the independence, that hangs for support
upon the uncertain fruits of daily exertions! Independent, indeed, such
situations may be deemed from the oppressions of power, or the tyrannies
of caprice and ill humour; but the difficulty of obtaining employment,
the irregularity of pay, the dread of want,--ah! what is freedom but a
name, for those who have not an hour at command from the subjection of
fearful penury and distress?'
'If all this is so,' said Elinor, 'which, unless you wait for Lord
Melbury's majority, is more than incomprehensible; what say you, now, to
an asylum safe, at least, from torments of this sort;--will you
commission me, at length, to apply to Mrs Ireton?'
Juliet, instinctively, recoiled at the very name of that lady; yet a
little reflection upon the dangers to which she was now exposed, through
unprotected poverty; through the lawless pursuit of Sir Lyell Sycamore;
and the vindictive calumnies of the Brinvilles, made the wish of solid
safety repress the disgusts of offended sensibility; and, after a
painful pause, she recommended herself to the support of Elinor:
resolving to accept, for the moment, any proposition, that might secure
her an honourable refuge from want and misconception.
Elinor, looking at her suspiciously, said, 'And Harleigh?--Will he let
you submit to such slavery?'
Mr Harleigh, Juliet protested, could have no influence upon her
determination.
'But you yourself, who a month or two ago, could so ill bear her
tauntings, how is it you are thus suddenly endued with so much
humility?'
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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