British -- India -- Fiction; India -- History -- British occupation, 1765-1947 -- Fiction
At first she was so much absorbed in listening and looking for the
sounds and movements which never came, that she had no thought of her
surroundings, but after a time they forced themselves upon her notice.
The deathlike silence all around, the presence of that shrouded form
upon the bed, the uncertain light--all combined to strain her nerves
to their utmost tension. She would have risen and walked about, in the
hope of breaking the spell, but she discovered that she had no power
to stir. The semi-darkness was full of shadows for which she could not
account, and small mysterious noises sounded in her ears like
thunder-claps. Over and over again she thought she saw her patient
move, only to find that her eyes had deceived her, and the breathless
expectation did but increase the strain upon her. By degrees her
terror grew almost uncontrollable, but she fought against it doggedly.
Never in her life had she placed such constraint upon herself. The
door was so near, two steps would take her to it, and once outside she
would be safe from the shadows and the silence. But she gripped her
chair hard with both hands, and at last the impulse passed away. Next
came the temptation to scream--to shriek, sing, do anything to break
the stillness. She was shaking from head to foot; it seemed utterly
impossible to check her sobs, yet she succeeded in crushing them down.
The struggle was a fearful one, and she felt that her self-command
would not hold out much longer. She looked at her watch, and resolved
to remain quiet for five minutes, whatever happened. When the five
minutes was over, she renewed the resolution for another five minutes,
and so on, and the expedient was successful for a time. Then it became
more and more difficult to maintain, and the periods of five minutes
dwindled to four, three, and finally one. She gazed at the watch
aghast. It was impossible that so much agony and mental stress could
have been crowded into one minute. But the watch had not stopped, and
she gave up the conflict, and burst into tears.
“Fitz!” she wailed, dropping on her knees beside the bed. “Fitz!”
Surely he would hear. Georgia had said that Dick’s voice would reach
her if she were dead. But in this case there was no answer.
“Oh, Fitz, speak to me!” she entreated. “I am so frightened.”
The piteous voice died away. It must have availed to pierce the
silence which enwrapped him, she thought, and yet he would not speak.
Could it be that he was resolved to punish her for her coldness in the
past, to humble her pride in return for all she had made him suffer?
Or perhaps he did not understand even yet.
“Fitz,” she murmured softly, “I love you.”
No sooner had the words escaped her lips than she sprang up aghast.
They seemed to be echoed back by the walls on every side, to be
whispered by mocking sprites, to clang like the strokes of great
bells. “I love you! I love you!” The air was full of them, and she was
overwhelmed with shame.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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