Hearken, dear sister, said Birdalone: thou knowest, for thou thyself
wast the first to tell me thereof, that I am the supplanter in our
fellowship, and that I have undone Atra’s hope. This I did not of mine
own will, but it came unto me; yet of mine own will I can do the best I
may to amend it; and this is the best, that I depart hence before the
Red Hold is taken and my lords come back; for if they come back and I
see my lord Arthur, so fair and beauteous as he is, before me, never
shall I be able to go away from him. And lo thou, I have promised Atra
by all the kindness she did me when we were come to the Wailing Tower,
and I naked and quaking and half-dead with terror, that if occasion
served I would do my utmost to help her, even if it were to my own
grief. Now behold this that now is, is the occasion, and there will not
be another; for when my love comes home hither and beholdeth me, think
thou how all the desire which has been gathering in his heart this
while will blossom and break forth toward me; and mayhappen he will
make but little semblance of it before other folk, for proud and high
of heart is he; but he will seek occasion to find me alone, and then
shall I be with him as the lark in the talons of the sparrow-hawk, and
he will do his pleasure of me, and that with all the good-will of my
heart. And then shall I be forsworn to Atra, and she will hate me, as
now she doth not, and then is all the fellowship riven, and that by my
deed.
Yet was Viridis wrath, and she said: Meseemeth this is fool’s talk.
Will not the fellowship be all the more riven if thou depart and we see
thee no more?
O nay, said Birdalone; for when I am gone thy love shall be no less for
me, though as now thou art angry; and Atra will love me for that I
shall have held to my promise to mine own scathe; and thy man and Aurea
will lay it to me that I have done valiantly and knightly. And Arthur,
how can he choose but love me; and maybe we shall yet meet again.
And therewithal she did at last bow down her head and fall to weeping,
and Viridis was moved by her tears and fell to kissing and caressing
her.
After a little Birdalone lifted up her head and spake again: Moreover,
how can I dare to abide him? didst thou not see how grim he was to me
when they delivered me and brought me back? and he with his own lips
told me so much, that it was because he doubted that I had done amiss;
and now if I do amiss again, even if it be at his bidding, will it not
be so that he will speedily weary of me, and curse me and cast me off?
What sayest thou, Viridis mine?
What is to say, said Viridis, save that thou hast broken my heart? But
thou mayst heal it if thou wilt take thy words back, and tell me that
thou wilt not sunder thee from us.
But Birdalone brake out weeping and lamenting aloud, and she cried out:
Nay, nay, it may not be; I must depart, and Atra hath smitten me amidst
of my friends. And Viridis knew not what to say or to do.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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