"Tivy or Trivy or Tantivy," says Mr. Fielding; "you are sure his name is nothing of that sort? Now could it by any chance be Tiverton?" At this mention of my name Cynthia was unable to go further with her imposture. With a face of much confusion and distress she made the confession. "Well, madam," says Mr. Fielding reproachfully, "why could you not have said so at once without so much beating about the bush? Really the name of Smith was too facile, too obvious. Now as it happens, I am in a position to know where my Lord Tiverton is." "Oh, sir," says Cynthia, clasping her hands, "I beseech you to tell me of his whereabouts." "Yes, my dear madam," says Mr. Fielding, "that I will, on one condition." Mrs. Cynthia eagerly asked it. "That you give me a kiss," says Mr. Fielding. "I vow and protest, madam, I never saw a creature more divinely handsome." My breath was almost taken away by the audacity of the villain, as I fear he had intended that it should be. But what could I contribute to the situation beyond a few impotent threats, made in dumb show? I was never had at a greater disadvantage in my life? It was in vain that Cynthia evaded the demand, and besought him by the name of humanity to tell her where I lay. The spirit of mischief in the fellow, inflamed by the quantity of wine he had drunk, caused him to brook no denial. "Come, my dear madam," says he, "one kiss from those dainty lips is all I seek. Then i'faith shall you know where your husband lies." "You are no gentleman, sir," says Cynthia, with more spirit than she had yet shown. "No, only a justice of the peace," says he. "It is cruel of you," says Cynthia, flaming, "to drive such a bargain in these circumstances. You know it is not in my power to say you nay when so much is at stake." "To be sure I do," says he, favouring me with a triumphing look. "And as for the cruelty of it, surely the onus of that matter lies with you. Is it not your adorable sex that provokes that which it denies? It is ever a point with me that if I can ever take any little revenge upon you, I take it with an easy conscience, knowing full well that you beauteous ladies have scored up such a heavy tally of cruelties as can never be expunged. Besides, madam, where is this cruelty you speak of? Am I not at least as well favoured as this ugly profligate Lord Tiverton of yours; and is there not the additional advantage of my not being your lawful wedded husband?" "I would that Lord Tiverton were here to hear you say this," says Cynthia indignantly. "Bah," says Mr. Fielding, "the water-blooded fellow, I would that he were too, then I with five pints of good claret in me would prove upon his miserable person how mean a figure he doth cut."