KITTY. Here's a little Christmas present for you. (_Hands it to him._) EDDIE (_reads card on it_). "Merry Christmas to my Darling Kittens." Is dat for me? KITTY. Oh, no; not the card, just the embroidery. EDDIE (_holding it up_). Lawdy, Mis' Williams, what is dis yere? A dust cap? KITTY. It's a cover for a pin-cushion. Isn't it a dear? EDDIE. I hopes you'll excuse me, but honest I hain't got no more use for dat thing dan a pussy cat has for a hot water bottle. KITTY (_opening larger package_). Throw it in the waste basket, Eddie. This is from Warren. I know the handwriting. It looks like a hat. (_Opens box and removes wrappings, disclosing a hideous red and orange hat._) Heavens, what a nightmare! Red and orange and a style four years old. It must have come from the five and ten cent store. Look at the plume! Oh! EDDIE (_admiring it_). Um-um, dat shore am a fine present. Your husband certainly am a man ob taste, he shore am. KITTY (_sarcastically_). Yes, he has wonderful taste, hasn't he? A little bizarre. No, it's more than bizarre; it's baroque. EDDIE. It looks like a hat to me. KITTY. I know what I'll do. (_Wraps it up and puts it back in box._) EDDIE. Dat certainly was a nice present, Mis' Williams. Must have cost a heap of money. KITTY. It probably did. But it isn't my style. And Madame Brunot never exchanges hats. What a shame! I suppose he paid an enormous price for it and I could have satisfied myself with one for half the money. If only men would allow their wives to select their own Christmas presents. _Enter_ LAURA LACEY _from R._ LAURA. Hello, Kittens. I saw your door open and came right in. KITTY (_kisses her_). That's right, Lolly. I was just going over to your apartment. I have a little present for you. LAURA. A present? You dear! (_Kisses her again._) KITTY. Yes. Here! (_Gives her the box containing the hat._) I hope you'll like it. LAURA. A hat? Oh, you darling! (_Kisses her again._) WARREN (_outside L._). Kitty! KITTY (_goes to door at L._). Yes, Warren? WARREN. I can't find my collar button. KITTY. Did you look on the dresser? WARREN. Of course I did. I've looked every place except in the refrigerator. KITTY. I'll be back in a minute, Laura. Excuse me. (_Hurries out L._) LAURA (_opens the box hastily and takes out the hat_). Red and orange! Horrors! And I gave her a cut glass cold-cream jar that I got at the auction. I wouldn't wear this to a dog fight. Eddie! EDDIE. Yas'm. LAURA. You've been a good boy to us all year. I'm going to give you a lovely Christmas present. EDDIE. Is you? LAURA. I'm going to give you this duck of a hat. (_Holds it up._) EDDIE (_delighted_). Dat red and yaller hat? LAURA. Yes. Hurry and put it in the box. I don't want Kitty Williams to know I gave her Christmas present away. (_They put it in box._) EDDIE. Um-um! Dat shore am some Christmas present. Won't ma lady-love be delighted with all dat gorgeousness? I certainly am much obliged to you, Mis' Lacey; I shore am.