Seeing that she appeared ill and pale, a woman sitting before the French
doors opening into her room, shoved a chair in Edith’s direction and
asked if she did not wish to sit down and rest for a few minutes.
“Thank you,” replied Edith, “you’re very kind. I have been ill, but I am
much better now.”
She glanced at the woman, and seeing that her dress and manner indicated
that she was not a babbling person who would tire her with senseless
chatter, she took the chair and sitting down, leaned against the balcony
railing and looked at the people moving through the grounds below. There
were wide stretches of beautifully kept lawns, every kind of tree and
shrub imaginable. There were fountains around which grew tropical water
plants and in which goldfishes swam lazily. It was the first minute of
quiet that Edith had experienced outside of her rooms. She enjoyed the
night air. She watched big, velvet-winged moths fluttering toward the
lights at the entrance to the grounds and to the building. A sense of
peace and rest stole through her. The torment of doubt and uncertainty
that had racked her ever since her marriage to Junior eased slightly.
She had cared for him so intensely that she found herself doing what he
asked without stopping to look into his reasons, but after a few weeks
of deliberation, she had reached the conclusion that while he was doing
his best to be nice to her, to keep her pleased and happy, he did not
love her and he never had. This had bred a bitterness in her heart
surpassing anything she ever before had experienced. Undoubtedly, it had
been the cause of her illness. Her one hope had been that in time Junior
would come to care for her as she knew he always had cared for Mahala.
When the real breakdown came, and the mystery of the lost pocket book
refused to be solved, Edith was tried to the breaking point. She could
not eat; she could not sleep; she could not keep from thinking, and
occasionally in her thoughts there would be thrust into her
consciousness ugly things that she always had heard said about the elder
Moreland and Junior.
Hour by hour, she kept reviewing her whole life in reference to her
relations with Mahala. With Junior she never had come in contact except
through Mahala. She remembered how she had stood with her programme
ready Commencement night and he had not even asked her for one dance as
he stood laughingly sprawling his name all over Mahala’s card. Even
Henrick Schlotzensmelter had known that it was proper for each boy of
the class to ask each girl for at least one dance. For a minute as she
descended from the omnibus, Edith had thought that at last Junior had
really seen her. His words had furnished her the spur that carried her
through her first public appearance triumphantly, when she had started
with every expectation that she would fail and be forced to resort to
her written speech.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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