Bildungsromans; Midlands (England) -- Fiction; Young men -- Fiction
“These lean arms of tomorrow’s round me, and the white arms round you,”
he replied, smiling whimsically. She reached out and clasped his hand.
“You foolish boy,” she said.
He laughed painfully, not able to look at her.
“You know,” he said, and his voice was low and difficult “I have needed
you for a light. You will soon be the only light again.”
“Who is the other?” she asked.
“My little girl!” he answered. Then he continued, “And you know, I
couldn’t endure complete darkness, I couldn’t. It’s the solitariness.”
“You mustn’t talk like this,” she said. “You know you mustn’t.” She put
her hand on his head and ran her fingers through the hair he had so
ruffled.
“It is as thick as ever, your hair,” she said.
He did not answer, but kept his face bent out of sight. She rose from
her seat and stood at the back of his low arm-chair. Taking an amber
comb from her hair, she bent over him, and with the translucent comb
and her white fingers she busied herself with his hair.
“I believe you _would_ have a parting,” she said softly.
He laughed shortly at her playfulness. She continued combing, just
touching, pressing the strands in place with the tips of her fingers.
“I was only a warmth to you,” he said, pursuing the same train of
thought. “So you could do without me. But you were like the light to
me, and otherwise it was dark and aimless. Aimlessness is horrible.”
She had finally smoothed his hair, so she lifted her hands and put back
her head.
“There!” she said. “It looks fair fine, as Alice would say. Raven’s
wings are raggy in comparison.”
He did not pay any attention to her.
“Aren’t you going to look at yourself?” she said, playfully
reproachful. She put her finger-tips under his chin. He lifted his head
and they looked at each other, she smiling, trying to make him play, he
smiling with his lips, but not with eyes, dark with pain.
“We can’t go on like this, Lettie, can we?” he said softly.
“Yes,” she answered him, “Yes; why not?”
“It can’t!” he said, “It can’t, I couldn’t keep it up, Lettie.”
“But don’t think about it,” she answered. “Don’t think of it.”
“Lettie,” he said. “I have to set my teeth with loneliness.”
“Hush!” she said. “No! There are the children. Don’t say anything—do
not be serious, will you?”
“No, there are the children,” he replied, smiling dimly.
“Yes! Hush now! Stand up and look what a fine parting I have made in
your hair. Stand up, and see if my style becomes you.”
“It is no good, Lettie,” he said, “we can’t go on.”
“Oh, but come, come, come!” she exclaimed. “We are not talking about
going on; we are considering what a fine parting I have made you down
the middle, like two wings of a spread bird——” she looked down, smiling
playfully on him, just closing her eyes slightly in petition.
He rose and took a deep breath, and set his shoulders.
“No,” he said, and at the sound of his voice, Lettie went pale and also
stiffened herself.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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