The Widow Barnaby. Vol. 3 (of 3)Trollope, Frances Milton
General
The Widow Barnaby. Vol. 3 (of 3)
Trollope, Frances Milton
England -- Social life and customs -- 19th century -- Fiction; Social classes -- England -- Fiction; Widows -- Fiction
By melancholy degrees everything that had most contributed to her
happiness, became her torment. The conversation of Miss Peters was
inexpressibly irksome to her, particularly when they found themselves in
confidential _tête-à-tête_, for then she could not help suspecting that
her friend was longing to ask her some questions respecting the
singularity of her lover's manner ... the flattering notice of the
well-pleased Lady Elizabeth, the sisterly affection manifested by the
amiable Lady Stephenson, and, more than all the rest, the happy,
bustling, business-like manner of her aunt Compton, who never for a
moment seemed to forget that they were all preparing for a wedding.
So complete was this pre-occupation, that it was many days before the
old lady perceived that her Agnes, in the midst of all this joyful
preparation, looked neither well nor happy; nay, even when at last the
sad eye and pale cheek of her darling attracted her attention, she
persuaded herself for many days more that love-making was too
sentimental a process to permit those engaged in it to be gay. She knew
that the sighing of lovers was proverbial, and though she did not
remember to have read any thing upon the subject exactly resembling
what she remarked in Agnes, and, to say truth, in Colonel Hubert also,
she did not, for she could not, doubt that everything was going on just
as it should do, though her own want of practical experience rendered
her incapable of fully understanding it.
But if Agnes was wretched, Colonel Hubert was infinitely more so; for
all the misery that she darkly feared, without knowing either its nature
or for how long it was likely to continue, came to him with the
tremendous certainty of a misfortune that had already fallen upon him,
and from which escape seemed less possible from day to day. She knew not
what to think of him, and great, no doubt, was the unhappiness produced
by such uncertainty, but greater still was the suffering produced by
looking in her innocent face, and knowing, as well as Colonel Hubert
did, why it grew daily paler. Not seldom, indeed, was he tortured by the
apprehension that the line of conduct he had pursued in recalling
Frederick Stephenson, was by no means so unquestionably right in its
self-sacrificing severity as he had intended it should be. Had he not
endangered the tranquillity of Agnes, while guarding with jealous care
his own proud sense of honour? If an unhappy concurrence of
circumstances had involved him in difficulties that rendered his conduct
liable to suspicion, ought he not to have endured the worst degree of
contempt that this could bring upon him, rather than have suffered her
peace to be the sacrifice?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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