The Wings of Icarus: Being the Life of one Emilia FletcherAlma-Tadema, Laurence
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The Wings of Icarus: Being the Life of one Emilia Fletcher
Alma-Tadema, Laurence
Epistolary fiction
How it went with them I know not, but I was soon entirely lost in
what I heard. With my head upon my arm I listened, the visions that
he conjured filled my eyes, the music of his words engrossed my
ears; more beautiful in form and purpose than anything he yet had
written, this last canto filled me with joy and pride.
When the last words fell, I did not raise my head from the table.
Heaven knows why, but I did not want to let them see, not even them,
that the tears were gushing from my eyes.
I heard Gabriel collect his papers and put them into his pocket;
still none of us spoke. It seemed time to break the silence. I
lifted my head and looked up at my poet.
There he sat with head thrown back and quivering lips; his eyes,
wide with mingled fear and yearning, were fixed upon Constance,
whose white, uplifted face was as the mirror of his own. It was for
an instant only; the next, they turned to me.
And so the tale was told; we sat there, we three, blenched and
panic-stricken, gazing into each other's eyes.
The time had come. I rose, took their hands, and laid them together
on the table. I would have said something, but no words came; so,
smiling simply into the face of each, I bent and kissed the
intertwining fingers, then left the room. I groped my way into the
garden, and, standing on a flower-bed beneath the window, looked in
upon them. They sat as I had left them, with clasped hands and
mingled gaze. I think it was Constance that moved first, I am not
sure, but they rose suddenly and fell into each other's arms. For an
instant I looked upon them with a strange sense of exultation, as
if, perhaps, I were the Spirit of Love, and not a jealous woman. But
when he turned back her white face with his hand and bent over her,
all the woman in me returned. I saw her little hands clutch him
convulsively, she gave a low cry,--and then I slipped from the
window on to the ground.
How long I crouched there I cannot tell; I felt as one must feel
that has been buried for dead and awakes in the grave. There was
mignonette beside me, and a clump of southern wood. It was the sound
of some one bounding down the steps that roused me. Gabriel had left
her. I got up and shook my clothes, walking to and fro on the lawn.
When at length I thought of going home, I remembered that I had left
my things in Constance's room, and that it might seem strange in me
to arrive at the house bareheaded. So I went upstairs. The passage
was not quite dark; I could just see that Constance lay outside her
bedroom door. I stooped and tried to raise her, but she flung
herself to my knees, crying:
"Emilia!--O my God!"
"Hush!" said I; "come into the room. Hush! the servants might hear
you."
So I drew her in and would have laid her on her bed; but again she
fell down and clasped my knees.
"Dear!" she cried; "dear, you loved me so, and this is what I have
done. Oh, Emilia, forgive me!--Emilia, forgive me, oh, forgive me!"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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