Love stories, German; Sisters -- Fiction; Suicide victims -- Fiction
Then he said, "The old proverb about the good intentions with which the
path to Hell is paved, may hold good here too; but it only touches the
surface of the matter. This resolve was a last abortive attempt to
unite sisterly love with her longing for you, to make a pact between
her powerful, burning desire for happiness and the impulse to keep
faith towards her sister. It was the most unnatural thing she could hit
upon, for silent resignation was not in her line. It was a particularly
cruel fate which doomed her, with her noble disposition and powerful
will, to be forced into a sin which is the most common and most
cowardly on earth, a sin which I have found lurking on countless faces,
when I stood at the bedside of people seriously ill. This, my boy, is
one of the darkest spots in human nature, a remnant of bestiality which
has managed to find its way into our tamed world; even such sensitive
natures as Olga may fall a prey to it, though of course they perish
through it, while coarser souls simply conceal and suppress what is
struggling to appear from the darkest depths of their beings. Wait, I
will speak more plainly. I once came to the bedside of a rich old man,
a landowner, whose last breath was not far off. At the head of his bed
stood his eldest son, a man of about forty, who for long years had held
the post of inspector on strange estates, and whose intended bride was
beginning to grow old and faded with waiting. The son was a good,
honest fellow who would not have hurt a fly, who loved his father with
all his heart, and would certainly have been ashamed to wish his
deadliest enemy any ill; but in the stealthy, terrified glance with
which he watched me, while I bent down my ear towards the old man's
breast, I distinctly read the wish! 'Oh, that he might die!' Another
time I was called in to a woman who was very happy in second marriage.
Only one cloud troubled her new happiness. Her husband could not
befriend himself with the child of her first marriage. He knitted his
brows at the mere mention of the little creature, and as she loved him
passionately, she feared he might come to hate her on the child's
account, and hid it away from him as much as ever she could. The child
got scarlet fever. I found the mother kneeling at its bedside and
weeping bitterly. She trembled in fear for the feeble little life.
Had she not herself brought it forth! Then her husband entered the
room--she started--and in the restless, wavering glance which she cast
towards the cradle, there stood clearly and legibly written: 'It would
be for my happiness, if you died.' I could give you innumerable
examples where jealousy, covetousness, desire for independence,
restlessness, impulse for liberty, amorous longing, have matured this
terrible, criminal wish, which suddenly rises up dark and gigantic
within the human breast, in which hitherto only love and light have
found a place. Happily nowadays it does not do much harm. In olden,
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account