American literature -- Humor; American wit and humor
_"Dear Madam--We are glad to have your tender and delicately
sympathetic picture of village life. There is a note of true
sentiment and a generous appreciation of homely virtue marking this
story for which we desire to add an especial word of praise. Check
enclosed._
_"Very truly yours,
"The Editor of A----."_
Melinda sank limply on the bleached, last year's grass at the foot of
the tree. "Tender and delicately sympathetic picture"--"Generous
appreciation!" She laughed feebly. The editor was pleased to be
facetious. Having a fine sense of humor himself he showed his
realization of the story by acknowledging it in the same vein of subtle
satire.
She reread the letter and unfolded the slip of paper with serrated
edges with changing emotions. After all it was not such a very bad
story. She permitted herself to recall how humorous it was, how
cleverly and keenly it laid bare the ridiculous, the unexpected, how
it scintillated with wit and abounded in droll and subtle distinctions
and descriptions--all--all at the expense of her nearest relatives and
her dearest friends.
Melinda thought she would return the check and demand that her story be
sent back to her or destroyed; but, reflecting that Punch's advice is
applicable to other things than matrimony and suicide, she didn't. She
resolutely put her literary Frankenstein behind her. She reasoned that
in all probability the story would not be published during the lifetime
of any of the originals of the characters; that even if the worst came
to the worst, Mossdale was likely to remain in ignorance that would be
blissful. The villagers were not wont to waste time on the printed word;
in fact, such was the profundity of their unenlightenment, few of them
had heard of the magazine with a name beginning with "A." Even John
Graham paid little attention to the secular periodicals; besides, if
absolutely necessary, John's attention might be diverted.
So Melinda went away on a visit. Her health demanded it. The doctor was
unable to name her malady, but she herself diagnosed it as
_magazinitis_.
Toward fall Melinda, entirely recovered, returned to Mossdale. Entirely
recovered, yet she turned cold, unseeing eyes on the newsboy when he
passed through the car with his towering load of varicolored
periodicals, and rather than be forced to the final resort of the
unaccompanied traveler, she welcomed the advent of an acquaintance
possessed of volubility of an ejaculatory, eruptive variety. After many
gentle jets and spurts of gossip much remained to be told, as the lady
hastily gathered up her impedimenta preparatory to alighting at her home
station.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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