American literature -- Humor; American wit and humor
Oh, somewhere in this favoured land the sun is shining bright,
The band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light,
And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout;
But there is no joy in Mudville--mighty Casey has struck out.
THE MARTYRDOM OF MR. STEVENS[8]
BY HERBERT QUICK
_Pietro:_ Th' offense, it seemeth me,
Is one that by mercy's extremest stretch
Might be o'erpassed.
_Cosimo:_ Never, Pietro, never!
The Brotherhood's honor untouchable
Is touch'd thereby. We build our labyrinth
Of sacred words and potent spells, and all
The deep-involved horrors of our craft--
Its entrance hedg'd about with dreadful oaths,
And every step in thridding it made dank
By dripping terror and out-seeping awe,
Shall it be said that e'en Ludovico
May break our faith and live? Never, say I!
--_Vision of Cosimo._
The Bellevale lodge of the Ancient Order of Christian Martyrs held its
meetings in the upper story of a tall building. Mr. Alvord called for
Amidon at eight, and took him up, all his boldness in the world of
business replaced by wariness in the atmosphere of mystery. As he and
his companion went into an anteroom and were given broad collars from
which were suspended metal badges called "jewels," he felt a good deal
like a spy. They walked into the lodge-room where twenty-five or thirty
men with similar "jewels" sat smoking and chatting. All seemed to know
him, but (much to his relief) before he could be included in the
conversation, the gavel fell; certain ones with more elaborate "jewels"
and more ornate collars than the rest took higher-backed and more highly
upholstered chairs at the four sides of the room, another stood at the
door; and still another, in complete uniform, with sword and belt, began
hustling the members to seats.
"The Deacon Militant," said the wielder of the gavel, "will report if
all present are known and tested members of our Dread and Mystic
Conclave."
"All, Most Sovereign Pontiff," responded the Deacon Militant, who proved
to be the man in the uniform, "save certain strangers who appear within
the confines of our sacred basilica."
"Let them be tested," commanded the Sovereign Pontiff, "and, if
brethren, welcomed; if spies, executed!"
Amidon started, and looked about for aid or avenue of escape. Seeing
none, he warily watched the Deacon Militant. That officer, walking in
the military fashion which, as patristic literature teaches, was adopted
by the early Christians, and turning square corners, as was the habit of
St. Paul and the Apostles, received whispered passwords from the two or
three strangers, and, with a military salute, announced that all present
had been put to the test and welcomed. Then, for the first time
remembering that he was not among the strangers, so far as known to the
lodge, Amidon breathed freely, and rather regretted the absence of
executions.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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