“I loved you from the moment when I first saw you,” said Unorna, trying
to speak calmly. “But you loved another woman. Do you remember her? Her
name was Beatrice, and she was very dark, as I am fair. You had lost her
and you had sought her for years. You entered my house, thinking that
she had gone in before you. Do you remember that morning? It was a month
ago to-day. You told me the story.”
“You have dreamed it,” said the Wanderer in cold surprise. “I never
loved any woman yet.”
Unorna laughed bitterly.
“How perfect it all was at first!” she exclaimed. “How smooth it
seemed! How easy! You slept before me, out there by the river that very
afternoon. And in your sleep I bade you forget. And you forgot wholly,
your love, the woman, her very name, even as Israel Kafka forgot to-day
what he had suffered in the person of the martyr. You told him the
story, and he believes you, because he knows me, and knows what I can
do. You can believe me or not; as you will. I did it.”
“You are dreaming,” the Wanderer repeated, wondering whether she were
not out of her mind.
“I did it. I said to myself that if I could destroy your old love, root
it out from your heart and from your memory and make you as one who had
never loved at all, then you would love me as you had once loved her,
with your whole free soul. I said that I was beautiful--it is true, is
it not? And young I am, and I loved as no woman ever loved. And I said
that it was enough, and that soon you would love me, too. A month has
passed away since then. You are of ice--of stone--I do not know of what
you are. This morning you hurt me. I thought it was the last hurt
and that I should die then--instead of to-night. Do you remember? You
thought I was ill, and you went away. When you were gone I fought with
myself. My dreams--yes, I had dreamed of all that can make earth Heaven,
and you had waked me. You said that you would be a brother to me--you
talked of friendship. The sting of it! It is no wonder that I grew faint
with pain. Had you struck me in the face, I would have kissed your hand.
But your friendship! Rather be dead than, loving, be held a friend! And
I had dreamed of being dear to you for my own sake, of being dearest,
and first, and alone beloved, since that other was gone and I had burned
her memory. That pride I had still, until that moment. I fancied that it
was in my power, if I would stoop so low, to make you sleep again as
you had slept before, and to make you at my bidding feel all I felt. I
fought with myself. I would not go down to that depth. And then I said
that even that were better than your friendship, even a false semblance
of love inspired by my will, preserved by my suggestion. And so I fell.
You came back to me and I led you to that lonely place, and made you
sleep, and then I told you what was in my heart and poured out the
fire of my soul into your ears. A look came into your face--I shall not
forget it. My folly was upon me, and I thought it was for me. I know the
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