There had been one moment of happiness, in that first kiss, in the first
pressure of those strong arms. Then night descended. The hands that held
her had not been yet unclasped, the kiss was not cold upon her cheek,
the first great cry of his love had hardly died away in a softened
echo, and her punishment was upon her. His words were lashes, his
touch poison, his eyes avenging fires. As in nature’s great alchemy the
diamond and the blackened coal are one, as nature with the same elements
pours life and death from the same vial with the same hand, so now the
love which would have been life to Unorna was made worse than death
because it was not for her.
Yet the disguise was terribly perfect. The unconscious spell had
done its work thoroughly. He took her for Beatrice, and her voice for
Beatrice’s there in the broad light, in the familiar place where he had
so often talked with her for hours and known her for Unorna. But a few
paces away was the very spot where she had fallen at his feet last night
and wept and abused herself before him. There was the carpet on which
Israel Kafka had lain throughout the long hours while they had watched
together. Upon that table at her side a book lay which they had read
together but two days ago. In her own chair she sat, Unorna still,
unchanged, unaltered save for him. She doubted her own senses as she
heard him speak, and ever and again the name of Beatrice rang in her
ears. He looked at her hands, and knew them; at her black dress,
and knew it for her own, and yet he poured out the eloquence of his
love--kneeling, then standing, then sitting at her side, drawing her
head to his shoulder and smoothing her fair hair--so black to him--with
a gentle hand. She was passive through it all, as yet. There seemed to
be no other way. He paused sometimes, then spoke again. Perhaps, in
the dream that possessed him, he heard her speak. Possibly, he was
unconscious of her silence, borne along by the torrent of his own long
pent-up speech. She could not tell, she did not care to know. Of one
thing alone she thought, of how to escape from it all and be alone.
She feared to move, still more to rise, not knowing what he would do. As
he was now, she could not tell what effect her words would have if
she spoke. It might be but a passing state after all. What would the
awakening be? Would his forgetfulness of Beatrice and his coldness to
herself return with the subsidence of his passion? Far better that than
to see him and hear him as he was now.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account