_2d Waiter._ Sir, the man that makes up the Directory is at the door. _Mr. H._ Give him a shilling; that is what these fellows come for. _2d Waiter._ He has sent up to know by what name your Honor will please to be inserted. _Mr. H._ Zounds, fellow, I give him a shilling for leaving out my name, not for putting it in. This is one of the plaguy comforts of going anonymous. [_Exit 2d Waiter._ _Enter 3d Waiter._ _3d Waiter._ Two letters for Mr. H. [_Exit._ _Mr. H._ From ladies (_opens them_). This from Melesinda, to remind me of the morning-call I promised; the pretty creature positively languishes to be made Mrs. H. I believe I must indulge her (_affectedly_). This from her cousin, to bespeak me to some party, I suppose (_opening it_),--Oh, "this evening"--"Tea and cards"--(_surveying himself with complacency_). Dear H., thou art certainly a pretty fellow. I wonder what makes thee such a favorite among the ladies: I wish it may not be owing to the concealment of thy unfortunate----pshaw! _Enter 4th Waiter._ _4th Waiter._ Sir, one Mr. Printagain is inquiring for you. _Mr. H._ Oh, I remember, the poet; he is publishing by subscription. Give him a guinea, and tell him he may put me down. _4th Waiter_. What name shall I tell him, Sir? _Mr. H._ Zounds, he is a poet; let him fancy a name. [_Exit 4th Waiter._ _Enter 5th Waiter._ _5th Waiter_. Sir, Bartlemy the lame beggar, that you sent a private donation to last Monday, has by some accident discovered his benefactor, and is at the door waiting to return thanks. _Mr. H._ Oh, poor fellow, who could put it into his head? Now I shall be teased by all his tribe, when once this is known. Well, tell him I am glad I could be of any service to him, and send him away. _5th Waiter_. I would have done so, Sir; but the object of his call now, he says, is only to know who he is obliged to. _Mr. H._ Why, me. _5th Waiter_. Yes, Sir. _Mr. H._ Me, me, me; who else, to be sure? _5th Waiter_. Yes, Sir; but he is anxious to know the name of his benefactor. _Mr. H._ Here is a pampered rogue of a beggar, that cannot be obliged to a gentleman in the way of his profession, but he must know the name, birth, parentage, and education of his benefactor! I warrant you, next he will require a certificate of one's good behavior, and a magistrate's license in one's pocket, lawfully empowering so and so to--give an alms. Anything more? _5th Waiter_. Yes, Sir; here has been Mr. Patriot, with the county petition to sign; and Mr. Failtime, that owes so much money, has sent to remind you of your promise to bail him.