_Q. C. S_. Order our army instantly to get Themselves in readiness; our self will head 'em. My lords, you are concerned as well as we T'oppose this foreign force, and we expect You join us with your utmost levies straight. Go, priest, and drive all frightful omens hence; To fright the vulgar they are your pretence, But sure the gods will side with Common Sense. [_Exit cum suis_. _Fireb_. They know their interest better; or at least Their priests do for 'em, and themselves. Oh! lords, This queen of Ignorance, whom you have heard Just now described in such a horrid form, Is the most gentle and most pious queen; So fearful of the gods, that she believes Whate'er their priests affirm. And by the Sun, Faith is no faith if it falls short of that. I'd be infallible; and that, I know, Will ne'er be granted me by Common Sense: Wherefore I do disclaim her, and will join The cause of Ignorance. And now, my lords, Each to his post. The rostrum I ascend; My lord of Law, you to your courts repair; And you, my good lord Physick, to the queen; Handle her pulse, potion and pill her well. _Phys_. Oh! my good lord, had I her royal ear, Would she but take the counsel I would give, You'd need no foreign power to overthrow her: Yes, by the gods! I would with one small pill Unhinge her soul, and tear it from her body; But to my art and me a deadly foe, She has averr'd, ay, in the publick court, That Water Gruel is the best physician; For which, when she's forgiven by the college, Or when we own the sway of Common Sense, May we be forced to take our own prescriptions! _Fireb_. My lord of Physick, I applaud thy spirit. Yes, by the Sun, my heart laughs loud within me, To see how easily the world's deceived; To see this Common Sense thus tumbled down By men whom all the cheated nations own To be the strongest pillars of her throne. [_Exeunt_ FIREB., LAW, _and_ PHYS. _Fust_. Thus ends the first act, sir. _Sneer_. This tragedy of yours, Mr Fustian, I observe to be emblematical; do you think it will be understood by the audience? _Fust_. Sir, I cannot answer for the audience; though I think the panegyrick intended by it is very plain and very seasonable. _Sneer_. What panegyrick? _Fust_. On our clergy, sir, at least the best of them, to shew the difference between a heathen and a Christian priest. And, as I have touched only on generals, I hope I shall not be thought to bring anything improper on the stage, which I would carefully avoid. _Sneer_. But is not your satire on law and physick somewhat too general? _Fust_. What is said here cannot hurt either an honest lawyer or a good physician; and such may be, nay, I know such are: if the opposites to these are the most general I cannot help that; as for the professors themselves, I have no great reason to be their friend, for they once joined in a particular conspiracy against me. _Sneer_. Ah, how so?