[159] It is hard for Andrugio to escape detection even when he is unarmed; but if he puts on his armour he will be at once recognised. Cf. p. 46:-- "If you are but seen, Your arms display you; therefore put them off." ACT V. SCENE I. _Palace of the Duke of Venice._ _Enter_ BALURDO, _a_ Painter _with two pictures_, _and_ DILDO. _Bal._ And are you a painter? sir, can you draw, can you draw? _Pa._ Yes, sir. _Bal._ Indeed, law! now so can my father's forehorse. And are these the workmanship of your hands? _Pa._ I did limn them. _Bal._ Limn them? a good word, limn them: whose picture is this? _Anno Domini_, 1599. Believe me, master Anno Domini was of a good settled age when you limn'd him: 1599 years old! Let's see the other. _Ætatis suæ_ 24. Byrlady, he is somewhat younger. Belike master _Ætatis suæ_ was _Anno Domini's_ son. 12 _Pa._ Is not your master a---- _Dil._ He hath a little proclivity to him. _Pa._ Proclivity, good youth? I thank you for your courtly proclivity. _Bal._ Approach, good sir. I did send for you to draw me a device, an Imprezza, by _Synecdoche a Mott_. By Phoebus' crimson taffeta mantle, I think I speak as melodiously,--look you, sir, how think you on't? I would have you paint me, for my device, a good fat leg of ewe mutton, swimming in stewed broth of plums (boy, keel[160] your mouth, it runs over) and the word[161] shall be, _Hold my dish, whilst I spill my pottage_. Sure, in my conscience, 'twould be the most sweet device, now. 25 _Pa._ 'Twould scent of kitchen-stuff too much. _Bal._ God's neaks, now I remember me, I ha' the rarest device in my head that ever breathed. Can you paint me a driveling reeling song, and let the word be, Uh. 30 _Pa._ A belch? _Bal._ O, no no: Uh, paint me Uh, or nothing. _Pa._ It cannot be done, sir, but by a seeming kind of drunkenness. _Bal._ No? well, let me have a good massy ring, with your own posy graven in it, that must sing a small treble, word for word, thus: _And if you will[162] my true lover be, Come follow me to the green wood._ _Pa._ O Lord, sir, I cannot make a picture sing. 40 _Bal._ Why? 'slid, I have seen painted things sing as sweet; But I have't will tickle it for a conceit, i'faith. _Enter_ FELICHE _and_ ALBERTO. _Alb._ O dear Feliche, give me thy device. How shall I purchase love of Rossaline? _Feli._ 'Swill, flatter her soundly. _Alb._ Her love is such, I cannot flatter her: But with my utmost vehemence of speech, I have ador'd her beauties. _Feli._ Hast writ good moving unaffected rhymes to her? _Alb._ O, yes, Feliche, but she scorns my writ. 50