_Py_. Try me. My principles have changed with my quarters. I find that down here our parents' heads are in no way connected with beans. _Aea_. Here is Solon, the son of Execestides, and there is Thales. By them are Pittacus, and the rest of the sages, seven in all, as you see. _Me_. The only resigned and cheerful countenances yet. Who is the one covered with ashes, like a loaf baked in the embers? He is all over blisters. _Aea_. That is Empedocles. He was half-roasted when he got here from Etna. _Me_. Tell me, my brazen-slippered friend, what induced you to jump into the crater? _Em_. I did it in a fit of melancholy. _Me_. Not you. Vanity, pride, folly; these were what burnt you up, slippers and all; and serve you right. All that ingenuity was thrown away, too: your death was detected.—Aeacus, where is Socrates? _Aea_. He is generally talking nonsense with Nestor and Palamedes. _Me_. But I should like to see him, if he is anywhere about. _Aea_. You see the bald one? _Me_. They are all bald; that is a distinction without a difference. _Aea_. The snub-nosed one. _Me_. There again: they are all snub-nosed. _Soc_. Do you want me, Menippus? _Me_. The very man I am looking for. _Soc_. How goes it in Athens? _Me_. There are a great many young men there professing philosophy; and to judge from their dress and their walk, they should be perfect in it. _Soc_. I have seen many such. _Me_. For that matter, I suppose you saw Aristippus arrive, reeking with scent; and Plato, the polished flatterer from Sicilian courts? _Soc_. And what do they think about _me_ in Athens? _Me_. Ah, you are fortunate in that respect. You pass for a most remarkable man, omniscient in fact. And all the time—if the truth must out—you know absolutely nothing. _Soc_. I told them that myself: but they would have it that that was my irony. _Me_. And who are your friends? _Soc_. Charmides; Phaedrus; the son of Clinias. _Me_. Ha, ha! still at your old trade; still an admirer of beauty. _Soc_. How could I be better occupied? Will you join us? _Me_. No, thank you; I am off, to take up my quarters by Croesus and Sardanapalus. I expect huge entertainment from their outcries. _Aea_. I must be off, too; or some one may escape. You shall see the rest another day, Menippus. _Me_. I need not detain you. I have seen enough. F. XXI _Menippus. Cerberus_ _Me_. My dear coz—for Cerberus and Cynic are surely related through the dog—I adjure you by the Styx, tell me how Socrates behaved during the descent. A God like you can doubtless articulate instead of barking, if he chooses. _Cer_. Well, while he was some way off, he seemed quite unshaken; and I thought he was bent on letting the people outside realize the fact too. Then he passed into the opening and saw the gloom; I at the same time gave him a touch of the hemlock, and a pull by the leg, as he was rather slow. Then he squalled like a baby, whimpered about his children, and, oh, I don't know what he didn't do.