The Works of Robert G. Ingersoll, Vol. 04 (of 12): Dresden Edition—LecturesIngersoll, Robert Green
Religion
The Works of Robert G. Ingersoll, Vol. 04 (of 12): Dresden Edition—Lectures
Ingersoll, Robert Green
Free thought
I am fighting the supernatural--the dogma of inspiration--the belief in
devils--the atonement, salvation by faith--the forgiveness of sins and
the savagery of eternal pain. I am fighting the absurd,-the monstrous,
the cruel.
The ministers pretend that they have advanced--that they do not believe
the things that I attack. In this they are not honest.
Who is the "man of straw"?
The man of straw is their master. In every orthodox pulpit stands this
man of straw--stands beside the preacher--stands with a club, called a
"creed," in his upraised hand. The shadow of this club falls athwart the
open Bible--falls upon the preacher's brain, darkens the light of his
reason and compels him to betray himself.
The man of straw rules every sectarian school and college--every
orthodox church. He is the censor who passes on every sermon. Now and
then some minister puts a little sense in his discourse--tries to take
a forward step. Down comes the club, and the man of straw demands an
explanation--a retraction. If the minister takes it back--good. If he
does not, he is brought to book. The man of straw put the plaster of
silence on the lips of Prof. Briggs, and he was forced to leave the
church or remain dumb.
The man of straw closed the mouth of Prof. Smith, and he has not opened
it since.
The man of straw would not allow the Presbyterian creed to be changed.
The man of straw took Father McGlynn by the collar, forced him to his
knees, made him take back his words and ask forgiveness for having been
abused.
The man of straw pitched Prof. Swing out of the pulpit and drove the
Rev. Mr. Thomas from the Methodist Church.
Let me tell the orthodox ministers that they are trying to cover their
retreat.
You have given up the geology and astronomy of the Bible. You have
admitted that its history is untrue. You are retreating still. You are
giving up the dogma of inspiration; you have your doubts about the flood
and Babel; you have given up the witches and wizards; you are beginning
to throw away the miraculous; you have killed the little devils, and in
a little while you will murder the Devil himself.
In a few years you will take the Bible for what it is worth. The good
and true will be treasured in the heart; the foolish, the infamous, will
be thrown away.
The man of straw will then be dead.
Of course, the real old petrified, orthodox Christian will cling to the
Devil. He expects to have all of his sins charged to the Devil, and at
the same time he will be credited with all the virtues of Christ. Upon
this showing on the books, upon this balance, he will be entitled to
his halo and harp. What a glorious, what an equitable, transaction! The
sorcerer Superstition changes debt to credit. He waves his wand, and he
who deserves the tortures of hell receives an eternal reward.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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