The Works of Robert Louis Stevenson - Swanston Edition, Vol. 15Stevenson, Robert Louis
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The Works of Robert Louis Stevenson - Swanston Edition, Vol. 15
Stevenson, Robert Louis
English literature -- 19th century
DOROTHY. Ay, you will never guess how much: you will never live to
understand how ignominious a defeat that conquest was. I loved and
trusted you: I judged you by myself; think, then, of my humiliation,
when, at the touch of trial, all your qualities proved false, and I
beheld you the slave of the meanest vanity--selfish, untrue, base!
Think, sir, what a humbling of my pride to have been thus deceived; to
have taken for my idol such a commonplace imposture as yourself; to have
loved--yes, loved--such a shadow, such a mockery of man. And now I am
unworthy to be the wife of any gentleman; and you--look me in the face,
George--are you worthy to be my husband?
AUSTIN. No, Dorothy, I am not. I was a vain fool; I blundered away the
most precious opportunity; and my regret will be lifelong. Do me the
justice to accept this full confession of my fault. I am here to-day to
own and to repair it.
DOROTHY. Repair it? Sir, you condescend too far.
AUSTIN. I perceive with shame how grievously I had misjudged you. But
now, Dorothy, believe me, my eyes are opened. I plead with you, not as
my equal, but as one in all ways better than myself. I admire you, not
in that trivial sense in which we men are wont to speak of women, but as
God's work: as a wise mind, a noble soul, and a most generous heart,
from whose society I have all to gain, all to learn. Dorothy, in one
word, I love you.
DOROTHY. And what, sir, has wrought this transformation? You knew me of
old, or thought you knew me? Is it in six months of selfish absence that
your mind has changed? When did that change begin? A week ago? Sure,
you would have written! To-day? Sir, if this offer be anything more than
fresh offence, I have a right to be enlightened.
AUSTIN. Madam, I foresaw this question. So be it: I respect, and I will
not deceive you. But give me, first of all, a moment for defence. There
are few men of my habits and position who would have done as I have
done: sate at the feet of a young boy, accepted his lessons, gone upon
his errand: fewer still, who would thus, at the crisis of a love, risk
the whole fortune of the soul--love, gratitude, even respect. Yet more
than that! For conceive how I respect you, if I, whose lifelong trade
has been flattery, stand before you and make the plain confession of a
truth that must not only lower me, but deeply wound yourself.
DOROTHY. What means----?
AUSTIN. Young Fenwick, my rival for your heart, he it was that sent me.
DOROTHY. He? O disgrace! He sent you! That was what he meant? Am I
fallen so low? Am I your common talk among men? Did you dice for me? Did
he kneel? O John, John, how could you! And you, Mr. Austin, whither have
you brought me down? shame heaping upon shame--to what end! O, to what
end?
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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