He has, indeed, a summer’s sun, that shines longer, brighter, and warmer; and his winter’s sun, which shines more faintly. He has fair and rainy days; he has a changeable intercourse of day and night: but light more or less, there is always. ♦ “attonement” replaced with “atonement” 10. Upon the whole, we may remark, 1. That we may heal our wounds slightly; but it is God’s prerogative to speak solid peace. 2. That considering our unbelief, and pride of heart, it is not easy to win a sinner to believe, that the forgiveness, which is with God, is able to answer all necessities. And when the soul is in some measure satisfied with this and willing to come to God daily for grace and mercy, it is not easy to keep up either a due abhorrence of sin, or a due sense of that boundless mercy. *Yea, here lies one of the greatest secrets of practical godliness, and the highest attainment in close walking with God, to come daily and wash, and yet retain as high a value for this discovery of forgiveness, as if it were only to be had once, and no more. The more we see of it, the more, doubtless, we ought to value it; whereas on the contrary, unless the utmost care be used, our hearts turn formal, and count it a common thing. I observe, ♦3. That the joy of the Lord is then only to be retained, when we walk tenderly and circumspectly: being inconsistent not only with any gross sin, but with any remissness of behaviour. And, lastly, That when I was at the lowest ebb, I have often recovered myself by thankfulness. If you ask, What I had then to be thankful for? I answer, I began thus: “What a mercy is it I am out of hell! Blessed be the Lord for this.” Again: “What a mercy is it, that he hath given me to see, and thank him for that mercy! Blessed be the Lord for this likewise.” And thus I have gone on, till he hath led me to a sense of his love, and restored comfort to my soul. ♦ “5.” replaced with “3.” ♦CHAPTER III. ♦ “PART” replaced with “CHAPTER” _A more particular account of his preceding doubts, concerning the being of God, and deliverance from them._ 1. I BEFORE mentioned the trials I had about the being of a God, almost as soon as I had any concern about religion. But at first I had no arguments, urged against it: only seeing this was the hinge on which all religion turned, I found myself at a loss for evidence so clear and strong, and convincing, as I thought necessary, with respect to a truth, whereon so much weight was to be laid. I said, “Very great things are demanded of me, and I am called to hope for great things; but, before, I trust so far, I would know more of that God, in whom I am to trust.”