Wednesday 8. I want to have every thought brought into obedience to Christ: And to feel continually the awful sense of the presence of the great God! I have had a thankful and a melting heart, to think what blessed helps my children have in their tender years; and indeed, in looking back on my own life, and on the blessed showers of grace, which God has poured upon me, from time to time, in christian conversation. Lord, give me a thankful heart, and fulfil in me all the good pleasure of thy will! Monday 20. Glory be to God, that I am out of hell, and that I still find, God is a God of love. My desire is, to begin now; to live this moment, and believe for the next. I have been for some time confined to my bed, and am still confined to my room. But all is well, while I am enabled, in every state, to be content. I have had a week of close trials and temptations; but of deep consolations likewise. But I see I am still short in bearing all things, and in discerning the enemy’s first approach. Yet glory be to thy great and holy name, for what I do enjoy. O help me to prize thy blessings more, and to believe and love to the end! Sunday 26. In the morning, before I rose, wandering thoughts were thrown into my mind. I begged the Lord to give me power to drive them out; and he heard my prayer. He gave me likewise a thankful heart, to think how richly he had provided for me, in temporals (while so many were in pressing want) as well as in spirituals: I could not help weeping before the Lord, and asking, “Why me, or mine? Why hast thou given _me_ this composure of mind, more desirable than all this world? Lord, give me to press after more inward solitude, and keep and water me every moment!” Sunday, May 3. Glory be to thy great and holy name, for all thy blessings and mercies: But above all, for my dear Jesus: I feel the value of his blood and merits more than ever. I find myself all weakness and helplessness: his blood is all my plea. Through this I enjoy great peace of mind; although much indisposed in body. But I have been in doubt what to do. I said, about a year before I found peace with God, that I would not eat any more flesh suppers, except I was with child. But, as my present disorder was thought to require it, I eat this evening a little of a calf’s foot. Lord, keep me from scrupulous fears after it: Let not the enemy accuse me for it. Help me in this, and all things, to extol thy love and guardian care. Monday 25. Glory be to God for new desires to serve him: Lord, encrease them every moment; and enable me to put in practice every desire, and every resolution, which is to thy glory! Let me never be weary of well-doing; but endure to the end, that no man take my crown!