The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 01 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original IllustrationsHood, Thomas
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The Works of Thomas Hood; Vol. 01 (of 11): Comic and Serious, in Prose and Verse, With All the Original Illustrations
Hood, Thomas
English poetry -- 19th century; English wit and humor; Humorous poetry, English
Alas! when in Brook Street the Upper,
In comfort I lived between walls,
I’ve gone to a dance for my supper;
But now I must go to Three Balls!
Folks talk about dressing for dinner,
But I have for dinner undrest;
Since Christmas, as I am a sinner,
I’ve eaten a suit of my best.
I haven’t a ram or a mummock
To fetch me a chop or a steak;
I wish that the coats of my stomach
Were such as my uncle would take!
When dishes were ready with garnish
My watch used to warn with a chime--
But now my repeater must furnish
The dinner in lieu of the time!
My craving will have no denials,
I can’t fob it off, if you stay,
So go,--and the old Seven Dials
Must tell me the time of the day.
Your chimes I shall never more hear ’em,
To part is a Tic Douloureux!
But Tempus has his edax rerum,
And I have my Feeding-Time too!
Farewell then, my golden repeater,
We’re come to my Uncle’s old shop--
And Hunger won’t be a dumb-waiter,
The Cerberus growls for a sop!
THE LIFE OF ZIMMERMANN.
(BY HIMSELF).
“This, this, is solitude.”--LORD BYRON.
I was born, I may almost say, an orphan; my Father died three months
before I saw the light, and my Mother three hours after--thus I was
left in the whole world alone, and an only child, for I had neither
Brothers nor Sisters; much of my after passion for solitude might be
ascribed to this cause, for I believe our tendencies date themselves
from a much earlier age, or rather, youth, than is generally imagined.
It was remarked that I could go alone at nine months, and I have had
an aptitude to going alone all the rest of my life. The first words
I learnt to say, were “I by myself, I”--or thou--or he--or she--or
it--but I was a long time before I could pronounce any personals in the
plural; my little games and habits were equally singular. I was fond of
playing at Solitary or at Patience, or another game of cards of my own
invention, namely, whist, with _three_ dummies. Of books, my favourite
was Robinson Crusoe, especially the first part, for I was not fond of
the intrusion of Friday, and thought the natives really were Savages
to spoil such a solitude. At ten years of age I was happily placed
with the Rev. Mr. Steinkopff, a widower, who took in only the limited
number of six pupils, and had only me to begin with; here I enjoyed
myself very much, learning in a first and last class in school hours,
and playing in play time at hoop, and other pretty games not requiring
partners. My playground was, in short, a garden of Eden, and I did not
even sigh for an Eve, but, like Paradise, it was too happy to last.
I was removed from Mr. Steinkopff’s to the University of Göttingen,
and at once the eyes of six hundred pupils, and the pupils of twelve
hundred eyes, seemed fastened upon me: I felt like an owl forced into
day-light; often and often I shammed ill, as an excuse for confining
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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