The World's Illusion, Volume 1 (of 2): EvaWassermann, Jakob
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The World's Illusion, Volume 1 (of 2): Eva
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
They all looked at him. There was something strangely proud about his
appearance. Letitia’s heart beat. When he looked at her, her eyes fell
and she blushed deeply. She loved all that he was, all that lay behind
him, all that he had experienced, all women he had loved, all men from
whom he came or to whom he went.
Suddenly she remembered the little golden toad. She had brought it with
her and she determined to give it to him to-day. But to do that she
wanted to be alone with him.
XVI
It was her wish that their meeting be at night, and she gave him a
sign. Unnoticed by the others, she succeeded in whispering to him that
she would come to him that night with a gift. He was to wait for her.
He looked at her without a word. When she glided away, his lips
throbbed.
After midnight, when all were asleep in the house, she left her
chamber, and mounted to the upper floor where Christian had his rooms.
She went softly but without especial fear. Bending her head forward,
she held in her hands the folds of the white silken over-garment that
she wore. Its transparent texture was more like a white shimmer, a
pearly gleam upon her flesh than a garment. It was doubled only about
her waist and bosom, and her steps were impeded by a satin riband
about her knees. Thus, while her pulses throbbed, she had to trip, to
her own amusement, like the Geisha girls she had seen in a theatre.
When Christian had locked the door behind her, she leaned against it in
sudden weakness.
Gently he took her wrists, and breathed a kiss upon her forehead,
smiled, and asked: “What did you want to bring to me, Letitia? I long
to know.”
Suddenly she was aware that she had forgotten the golden toy. Shortly
before she had left her room, she had laid it in readiness; and yet she
had forgotten it. “How stupid of me!” The words slipped out, and she
gazed in shame at her little shoes of black velvet. “How stupid of me!
There was a little toad made of gold that I meant to bring to you.”
It startled him. Then he recalled the words that he had spoken so many
months ago. The intervening time seemed thrice its natural length.
He wondered now how he could ever have been frightened of a toad. He
could, to be sure, hear his own words again: “Have a little toad made
of gold, that the evil magic may disappear.” But the monition had no
validity to-day. The spell had been broken without a talisman.
And as he saw the girl stand before him, quivering and intoxicated,
the trembling and the ecstasy seized him too. Many others had come to
him--none so innocent and yet so guilty, none so determined and so
deluded at once. He knew those gestures, that silent yearning, the eye
that flamed and smouldered, the half-denial and the half-assent, the
clinging and repulsing, the sighs and the magical tears that tasted
like warm and salty dew. He knew! And his senses urged him with all
their power to experience and to taste it all again.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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