The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): RuthWassermann, Jakob
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The World's Illusion, Volume 2 (of 2): Ruth
Wassermann, Jakob
German fiction -- Translations into English
One evening she returned from a charity kitchen, where twice a week
she helped for half an hour to serve the meals. She told Christian
about the people whom she was accustomed to see there--those whom the
great city had conquered. She imitated gestures and expressions, and
reported fragments of overheard speech. She communicated to him the
greed, disgust, contempt, and shame that she had seen. Her observation
was of a marvellous precision. Christian accompanied her on the next
occasion, and saw little, almost nothing. He was aware of people in
torn and shabby garments, who devoured a stingy meal without pleasure,
dipped the crusts of bread into soup, and surreptitiously licked the
spoon that had conveyed their last mouthful. There were hollow faces
and dim eyes, foreheads that seemed to have been flattened by hydraulic
pressure, and over it all a lifelessness as of scrapped machinery.
Christian was teased as by a letter in an unknown tongue, and he began
to understand how little he had learned to feel and see.
Although he had tried in no way to call attention to his presence, and
had seemed at first glance but another wanderer from the street, a
strange movement had passed through the hall. It had lasted no longer
than three seconds, but Ruth, too, had felt the vibration. She was
just filling one hundred and twenty plates, set in a fourfold circle,
with vegetables from a huge cauldron. She looked up in surprise. She
caught sight of the distinguished, almost absurdly courteous face of
Christian, and she was startled. With mystical clarity she perceived
the radiation of a power that wandered through the air without aim and
lay buried in a soul. She bent her head over the steaming cauldron, so
that her hair fell forward over her cheeks, and went on ladling out the
vegetables. But she thought of the many unhappy creatures who waited
for her on some hour of some day--suffering, confused, broken men and
women--whom she desired so passionately to help, but to whom she could
never be or give the miracle which had suddenly been revealed in that
all but momentary vibration.
In a wild enthusiasm that was foreign to her nature she thought: “One
must kneel and gather up all one’s soul....”
The one hundred and twenty tin plates were filled.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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