The yellow book, an illustrated quarterly. Vol. 2, July 1894
General
The yellow book, an illustrated quarterly. Vol. 2, July 1894
English literature -- 19th century -- Periodicals; Great Britain -- Periodicals; Literature, Modern -- 19th century -- Periodicals
And may the 'Day of Account of Words' take note of this! Then, says
the old fable, shall the soul of the departed be weighed against an
image of Truth. I tried to construct in imagination the form of the
dumb deity who should bear down the balances for me. Soundlessness was
turning fear to madness. I could neither quit nor longer bear company
the grim Presence in that room. But the supreme moment was very near.
Long since, the four low candles had burned out, and now the lamp was
struggling fitfully to keep alight. The flame could last but a few
moments. I saw it, and did not face the possibility of darkness. The
sleeping girl, I concluded rapidly, had used all available weapons of
defiant light.
As yet, since my entrance, I had hardly stirred, steadily supporting
the burden on my breast. Now, without remembrance of it, I started up
to escape. The violent suddenness of the action woke my companion. She
staggered blindly to her feet and confronted me as I gained the door.
Scarcely able to stand, and dashing the dimness from her eyes, she
clutched a corner of the drawers behind her for support. Her head
thrown back, and her dark hair hanging round it, crowned a grandly
tragic form. This was no poor pleader, and I was unarmed for fight.
She seized my throbbing arm and cried in a whisper, low and hoarse,
but strongly audible:
"For God's sake, stay here with me."
My lips moved vainly. I shook my head.
"For God in heaven's sake"--she repeated, swaying, and turning her
burning, reddened eyes on mine--"don't leave me now."
I stood irresolute, half stunned. Stepping back, she stooped and began
piecing together the dismembered letter on the bed. A mute protest
arrested her from a cold sister's face. She swept the action from her,
crying, "No!" and bending forward suddenly, gripped me with fierce
force.
"Here! Here!" she prayed, dragging me passionately back into the room.
The piteous need and wild entreaty--no, the vision of dire
anguish--was breaking my purpose of flight. A fragrance that was to
haunt me stole between us. The poor little violets put in their plea.
I moved to stay. Then a smile--the splendour of it may never be
reached again--touched her pale lips and broke through them,
transforming, with divine radiance, her young and blurred and
never-to-be-forgotten face. It wavered, or was it the last uncertain
flicker of the lamp that made me fancy it? The exquisite moment was
barely over when darkness came. Then light indeed forsook me. Almost
ignorant of my own intention, I resisted the now trembling figure,
indistinguishable in the gloom, but it still clung. I thrust it off me
with unnatural vigour.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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