The Youth of Jefferson: Or, a Chronicle of College Scrapes at Williamsburg, in Virginia, A.D. 1764Cooke, John Esten
General
The Youth of Jefferson: Or, a Chronicle of College Scrapes at Williamsburg, in Virginia, A.D. 1764
Cooke, John Esten
Jefferson, Thomas, 1743-1826 -- Fiction
And in the midst of all, who should make his appearance but--the
gallant Sir Asinus! Sir Asinus, no longer intending for Europe, but
satisfied with Virginia; no _longer_ woful, but in passable good
spirits; no longer melancholy, but surveying those around him with
affectionate regard.
And see him, in the midst of laughter and applause, mount on the end
of a barrel which had held innumerable cakes, holding a paper in his
hand, and calling for attention.
Listen!
"Whereas," reads Sir Asinus, "the undersigned has heretofore at
different times expressed opinions of his Majesty, and of the
Established Church, and of the noble aristocracy of England and
Virginia, derogatory to the character of the said Majesty, and so
forth;--also, whereas, he has unjustly slandered the noble and sublime
College of William and Mary, so called from their gracious majesties,
deceased;--and whereas, the said opinions have caused great personal
inconvenience to the undersigned, and whereas he is tired of martyrdom
and exile: Therefore, be it hereby promulgated, that the undersigned
doth here and now publicly declare himself ashamed of the said
opinions, and doth abjure them: And doth declare his Majesty George
III. the greatest of kings since Dionysius of Syracuse and Nero; and
his great measure, the Stamp Act, the noblest legislation since the
edict of Nantz. And further, the undersigned doth uphold the great
Established Church, and revere its ministers, so justly celebrated for
their piety and card-playing, their proficiency in theology, and their
familiarity with that great religious epic of the Reformation,
'Reynard the Fox'--the study of which they pursue even on horseback.
And lastly, the said undersigned doth honor the great college of
Virginia, and revere the aristocracy, and respect entails, and spurn
the common classes as becomes a gentleman and honest citizen; and in
all other things doth conform himself to established rules, being
convinced that whatever is, is right: and to the same hath set his
hand, this twentieth day of May, in the year 1764."
Having finished which, Sir Asinus casts a melancholy glance upon
little Martha, and adds:
"Now, my friends, let us proceed to enjoy the material comforts. Let
us begin to eat, my friends."
And sitting down upon the barrel, the knight seizes a goblet and
raises it aloft, and drinks to all the crowd.
And all the crowd do likewise, laughing merrily; and over them the
blossoms shower with every odorous breeze; and with the breeze mingles
a voice which whispers in a maiden's ear:
"Arcadia at last!"
CHAPTER XXX.
ILLUSTRATIONS.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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