They Call Me Carpenter: A Tale of the Second ComingSinclair, Upton
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They Call Me Carpenter: A Tale of the Second Coming
Sinclair, Upton
Hollywood (Los Angeles, Calif.) -- Fiction; Jesus Christ -- Fiction
The telephone rang, and there was the voice of T-S, fairly raving.
He didn't mind the “Examiner” stuff; that was good business, but
that in the “Times”--he was going to sue the “Times” for a million
dollars, by God, and would I back him in his claim that he had not
put Carpenter up to the healing business?
After a bit, the magnate began apologizing for his repudiation of
the prophet. He was in a position, just now with these hard times,
where the Wall Street crowd could ruin him if he got in bad with
them. And then he told me a curious story. Last night, after the
meeting, young Everett, his secretary, had come to him and asked if
he could have a couple of months' leave of absence without pay. He
was so much interested in Carpenter that he wanted to follow him and
help him!
“Y' know, Billy,” said the voice over the phone, “y' could a'
knocked me over vit a fedder! Dat young feller, he vas alvays so
quiet, and such a fine business feller, I put him in charge of all
my collections. I said to him, 'Vot you gonna do?' And he said, 'I
gonna learn from Mr. Carpenter.' Says I, 'Vot you gonna learn?' and
he says, 'I gonna learn to be a better man.' Den he vaits a minute,
and he says, 'Mr. T-S, he _told_ me to foller him!' J' ever hear de
like o' dat?”
“What did you say?”
“Vot could I say? I vanted to say, 'Who's givin' you de orders?' But
I couldn't, somehow! I hadda tell him to go ahead, and come back
before he forgot all my business.”
I dressed, and had my breakfast, and drove to St. Bartholomew's. It
was a November morning, bright and sunny, as warm as summer; and it
is always such a pleasure to see that goodly company of ladies and
gentlemen, so perfectly groomed, so perfectly mannered, breathing a
sense of peace and well being. Ah, that wonderful sense of well
being! “God's in His Heaven, all's right with the world!” And what a
curious contrast with the Labor Temple! For a moment I doubted
Carpenter; surely these ladies with their decorative bonnets, their
sweet perfumes, their gowns of rose and lilac and other pastel
shades--surely they were more important life-products than women in
frowsy and dowdy imitation clothes! Surely it was better to be
serene and clean and pleasant, than to be terrible and bewildered,
sick and quarrelsome! I was seized by a frenzy, a sort of
instinctive animal lust for this life of ease and prettiness. No
matter if those dirty, raucous-voiced hordes of strikers, and others
of their “ilk”--as the “Times” phrased it--did have to wash my
clothes and scrub my floors, just so that _I_ stayed clean and
decent!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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