Journalists -- Fiction; Man-woman relationships -- Fiction; Rich people -- Fiction; Social classes -- Fiction
"That's the way it was with me. A few months ago I thought my
convictions were as fixed as the everlasting hills. I looked solid--but
I wasn't. Really, I was made up of very small pieces. Then, when you
poked fun at me, you jarred one of those pieces out of place. That
moved another--and another--and another ... until with a rush, the whole
thing came tumbling about my ears. When the noise was over and the dust
settled, it was up to me to set about putting the pieces together again
as best I could. I don't know what kind of a mess I'd have made of it if
I hadn't had the luck to fall in with Dr. Weis--perhaps you've heard of
him?"
"Only vaguely," admitted Judith.
"Well, he's a Jew and a free thinker and an anarchist and a human
fire-brand--and the most all around fine character I've ever known!
Anyway, he took an interest in me as I floundered about--he seems to
think he can make something out of me." His mingled pride and humility
was indescribably boyish and lovable to Judith. He sounded a new note,
quite free from the cant with which, in her mind, he had never been
quite disassociated.
"And are you happier now?" she asked when he paused.
"Much," he said thoughtfully. "I was successful at St. Viateur's and I
was popular, and I thought I was doing good work. But I'm happier
now--really I am--consciously happy, I mean. In a way I'm a failure, of
course, and I've lost most of my old friends, but the newer ones seem
truer--and what I've lost in the respect of others, I've gained in the
respect of myself. Yes, I'm happier now."
"But what are you doing?"
"Well, we've established a sort of peoples' church, with meetings in one
of the downtown theatres. It's for those who haven't any creed, or even
much faith. We seem to have some kind of a hold. There's rarely an empty
seat."
"Do you preach?"
"Once in a while. But I wouldn't call it preaching. I've come to dislike
that word. This is something different. You can't _preach_, you know, to
our kind of people. That's what made lots of them leave their churches.
Jesus never preached. But oh, Judith--" His eyes flashed and she thought
his enthusiasm in keeping with his red tie. He had always been so
reserved, hitherto. "I've never experienced anything like talking to
those people. When I was in the pulpit at St. Viateur's, with all you
comfortable, smug, well-fed, contented people before me, talking to you
seemed only a form, and what I said, merely a formula. You didn't care
_what_ I said, and I didn't--it was _how_ I said it. But now--I tell you
there's an intoxication in talking to people who've come because they
get something, not because they ought to, or because it's the thing.
It's no wonder that the biggest men in the land are glad to appear on
our stage."
"Do you do any welfare work?" Judith found his enthusiasm infectious.
"In a way--mostly getting people jobs and things like that. We're not
very well organised yet, but we're working all the time."
"I suppose--you lack money?"
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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