"Up to then, no. Of course, I must have been found out in time, if only
from the suspicious circumstance that I could never accept any day
invitations. This was one of the reasons that weighed most strongly
with me in the resolve to give it up. I could not bear the thought that
the Tommy Esmond who bore himself so bravely in his new world, who had
managed to outlive all curiosity as to his antecedents, should be
discovered in his true colours, a poor City drudge in an insurance
office.
"To return to my story. I had dined with Lord Frederick at the --. No,
I will not give the name of the club, one of the most exclusive in
London: it might put you on his track. He had ordered a choice dinner,
and he plied me liberally with wine. My heart was very full at the
prospect of having to say good-bye to this luxurious life, in a very few
days' time.
"After dinner we went into the smoking-room, which was nearly empty, as
most of the members had left London. There were only two other
occupants, and they were at the far end of the apartment. Practically,
we had the place to ourselves.
"He urged me strongly to take a trip over to Paris as his guest. I
should have loved to go, but the wrench had to be made some time, it
might as well be made now. Besides, I was heavily in debt, for a poor
man, and I had not the cash to purchase the necessary outfit for such a
trip.
"He would not accept my first refusal, but tried to persuade me into
reconsidering. When I still persisted, he bluntly asked me my reasons.
"As I have said, I was very depressed that night at the prospect of all
I was saying good-bye to. This mood was responsible for my blurting out
a great portion of the absolute truth.
"I explained to him that I had already accepted too much of his
hospitality, which my circumstances did not enable me to return, that I
could no longer take advantage of his generosity.
"After this avowal, he did not speak for some little time, all the while
regarding me with an intense gaze that embarrassed me very much.
"`Thanks for telling me the truth,' he said at length. `Your confidence
is quite safe with me.' He added after a pause, `So you are a poor man,
in spite of the fact that your appearance does not suggest the fact.
Well, I may tell you that from the first moment I made your acquaintance
I was pretty certain you were.'
"I told him a little more. `I am so poor,' I said frankly, `that I
cannot afford to keep up appearances any longer. In a few days I shall
leave a world I ought never to have entered. Anyway, it is the last
time I shall dine with you, and I don't suppose we shall ever meet
again, unless we run across each other by chance in a very different
sphere.'
"`You have absolutely made up your mind to do this, for the reasons you
have given?' he asked presently.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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