Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a MelangeClarke, William
General
Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a Melange
Clarke, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Legal stories, English; West Country (England) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
The two brothers now approached Archibald, and most affectionately
entreated him to prolong his stay with them; and Reginald had just
extorted a promise from him to go to the vicarage for two or three days,
when a servant entered the room, and stated, that Constables Quality and
Batter had brought in some prisoners to be examined before his worship.
Sir Waldron desired that they might be taken into his study; and said,
that he would descend in a few minutes; but before the servant had
quitted the room, Archibald begged that they might be brought up, so
as to offer him an opportunity of witnessing, what he called, “a bit
of bumpkin police,” which he had not hitherto taken an opportunity of
enjoying. Sir Waldron acquiesced, and ordered the servant to send up the
constables, with their prisoners.
“You will neither be amused, interested, nor edified, I suspect,” said
Sir Waldron, to Archibald, “by the scene that is about to take place; it
is, doubtless, some trifling, ridiculous affair: the constables are
two of the most arrant blockheads that ever a magistrate was afflicted
with:--as to Onesiphorus Quality, one might as well attempt to elicit
evidence out of a mallet, as from him: I assure you, my patience and my
temper are often put to the test, by his stupid taciturnity.”
As the baronet concluded, the huge form, and meek, beardless face of
Constable Quality himself, appeared at the door-way, ushering in four
prisoners, who were closely followed by a man of a middling size, with
sharp features, a large mouth, piercing cat's eyes, and limbs which were
puny, compared with those of the gigantic, chill-looking Quality. The
person we have described as bringing up the rear, was Constable Batter:
the prisoners were our old friends, the pedlar, the tinker, Darby
Doherty, and the little girl. The pedlar placed his pack very carefully
on the ground, the little girl stood up behind it, and the three men
ranged themselves in a line, with Quality, on one side, and Batter, on
the other, in front of the table at which the brothers were now seated.
“What is the charge made against these people, Quality?” inquired Sir
Waldron.
“Well,--then,” replied Quality, “for that matter,--your worship,--you
must ask Batter.”
“I ha' nought to say,--nought in the world,” exclaimed Batter; “but
they're oddish bodies--I must say that for Quality. He apprehended and I
assisted;--not a thing more.”
“Your worship,” said Quality, with a most piteous countenance;--“your
worship know better:--I never apprehends nobody.”
“That's true enough. Constable Quality, I must needs confess,” observed
Sir Waldron.
“I thank your worship, kindly, for your good word,” quoth Quality.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account