Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a MelangeClarke, William
General
Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a Melange
Clarke, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Legal stories, English; West Country (England) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
At length, a loud halloo announced the approach of old Grobstock.
Skelpie instantly intimated his intention of decamping, but the vile
maid desired him to clamber up the oak, and hide amongst its branches,
until her daddy went to bed. Here was a terrific request!--“I won't go
into the hollow,” quoth he; “'cause the zuzpicious ould jakes do always
pry into there, avore a' do goa to bed.” I took the cuff of my coat
between my teeth, and resolutely prepared for the worst;--but Skelpie
ascended the other side of the tree. He had scarcely broken off the
prolonged salute of the kissing Ruth, when old Roger Grobstock, drunk,
and growling, staggered up to the door. “Eh! what, lassie--wench! out
and abroad at this time of night!” cried he, as Ruth tripped up towards
him. “Ahey! what, vlaunting and trapesing about the whoam-stead wi' some
vellow, I'll warrant! Odd! I'll verret un out; only bide a bit, I'll be
about un. I be downcast vor want of a frolic to-night; so, ecod!
lass, I'll duck the lad avore I goes to bed, just vor a bit of a joke
like,--all in good vellowship,--but, icod! I'll duck un, if he's a
friend; and if he is a stranger,--dost hear, wench?--I'll drash un wi'
the flail, just like a whate-sheaf.”
Every word of his speech was equal to a blow: I struggled to get free
with all my might; I had succeeded so far as to raise myself upright,
when the miller, who had entered the house at the conclusion of his
threat, re-appeared at the door with a flaming brand from the hearth in
one hand, and a tremendous dung-fork in the other. He staggered directly
close up to the tree; but the sight of my out-jutting stomach, and
alarmed visage, made him retreat a few paces. He thrust out the burning
stick so near my face, that it scorched my cheek; and after surveying my
disconsolate and rueful deportment for a minute or more, he grounded
his weapon, and accosted me in these words: “Why, thee bee'st a purty
vellur, beesen't?--And where did'st come vrom--and who bee'st? Art thee
a thief, or--but, noa, it can't be,--thee bee'st never come to court our
Ruth, bee'st?--speak, twoad, or I'll vork tha!”
There was Ruth, looking over her father's shoulder, evidently alarmed at
my appearance; Skelpie's heels were dangling over my head; the pronged
fork was close to my waistcoat; I stared in the face of the old man,
unable to utter a word, but sweating like a baited bull, and plainly
expressing my fears by my woebegone and pallid countenance. I expected
some dire punishment for my silence; but old Grobstock, after surveying
me for a minute, to my great surprise, burst into a loud laugh, seized
my trembling hand, and, with one vigorous effort, pulled me out of my
imprisonment. After dragging me, helpless as I was, into the house, and
placing me in a chair by the fire-side, he thrust a mug of cider and
brandy into my hand, chuckling out, “Why, zooks! chap, how vrighted thee
looks!--drink!” Here was a change!
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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