Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a MelangeClarke, William
General
Three Courses and a Dessert: Comprising Three Sets of Tales, West Country, Irish, and Legal; and a Melange
Clarke, William
Ireland -- Social life and customs -- Fiction; Legal stories, English; West Country (England) -- Social life and customs -- Fiction
But we mustn't forget Pierce Veogh,--though 'tisn't he is my hero
exactly, but Timberleg still I can't go on without him, no more than the
man in the book could play on the organ but for the boy that blowed the
bellows. Well, Pierce, as I tould you, had the bailiffs about for him
and as Timberleg seemed to have taken up his abode by The Beg,--which
was Pierce's place, you'll recollect,--why, Pierce thought he couldn't
do better than sneak off, if he could, to the town Nick came from, and
stay there for a day or two: for Pierce was trying his utmost to raise
money, and hoped to receive letters, post after post, to tell him things
were settled; and a day's delay was worth everything to him;--to say
nothing of the horror he felt, in common with most of us, to being shut
up between four walls.--Not that a prison, when you're used to it, is
the worst place in the world perhaps; for I know a man that hated the
name of it, and after he got into one at last, he liked it so well, that
when he could, he wouldn't come out of it, but turned turnkey, and kept
his post behind the gate, with the key in his hand, doing nothing but
opening and shutting the door, and never stirring out of the place,
which had grown a world to him, till death came one day, and removed
him to closer confinement within six boards, nailed together,--and that
manes a coffin.--Now, a coffin's a thing, allow me to remark, that we
all hate the sight of; and yet there's not one in ten thousand of us but
hopes to come to it at last;--for who'd like to be buried any way but
in a box?--And that's a feeling that's laughable to one who looks
two inches below the surface of things; for what is it, but a fear of
letting the cold clay come to us for a few years?--And come it will, you
know, at last, whether a man's buried in a large 'sheet of paper, a big
hollow stone, or a lead coffin. And what matters time to the dead?--Or
where's the difference, let me ask, between two minutes and twenty
thousand years, to them that's under the turf?--Do what we will, the
blackguard worms ates us all up at last; and they that takes pains to
preserve their bodies, don't do well, as I think: for, while all that
remains of me, after being buried in a dacent and ordinary way, some
time hence, becomes a part of the big earth, and can't be distinguished
from what it's mixed up with,--the visible and touchable nose of a
pickled emperor, a thousand years after he's dead, gets pulled by some
puppy that opens his grave, and don't happen to approve of what he did
when alive: or, what's worse, the bones of the arm that awed multitudes,
gets cut into drunken men's dominos; or the boys and girls of a tenth
generation plays with them for sugar-plums, in the shape of two a-penny
tetotums, and so forth. Therefore, let me, when I die, have no armour
about me; let the worms come, and good luck to them, say I;--the sooner
they walk away with every inch of me, the better.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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