Three Men and a MaidWodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
General
Three Men and a Maid
Wodehouse, P. G. (Pelham Grenville)
Humorous stories
In the height of the tourist season it is not always possible for one
who wishes to leave America to spring on to the next boat. A long
morning's telephoning to the offices of the Cunard and the White Star
brought Mrs. Hignett the depressing information that it would be a full
week before she could sail for England. That meant that the inflammable
Eustace would have over two weeks to conduct an uninterrupted wooing,
and Mrs. Hignett's heart sank, till suddenly she remembered that so
poor a sailor as her son was not likely to have had leisure for any
strolling on the deck during the voyage of the _Atlantic_.
Having realised this, she became calmer and went about her preparations
for departure with an easier mind. The danger was still great, but
there was a good chance that she might be in time to intervene. She
wound up her affairs in New York and, on the following Wednesday,
boarded the _Nuronia_ bound for Southampton.
The _Nuronia_ is one of the slowest of the Cunard boats. It was
built at a time when delirious crowds used to swoon on the dock if an
ocean liner broke the record by getting across in nine days. It rolled
over to Cherbourg, dallied at that picturesque port for some hours,
then sauntered across the Channel and strolled into Southampton Water
in the evening of the day on which Samuel Marlowe had sat in the lane
plotting with Webster, the valet. At almost the exact moment when Sam,
sidling through the windows of the drawing-room, slid into the cupboard
behind the piano, Mrs. Hignett was standing at the Customs barrier
telling the officials that she had nothing to declare.
Mrs. Hignett was a general who believed in forced marches. A lesser
woman might have taken the boat-train to London and proceeded to
Windles at her ease on the following afternoon. Mrs. Hignett was made
of sterner stuff. Having fortified herself with a late dinner, she
hired an automobile and set out on the cross-country journey. It was
only when the car, a genuine antique, had broken down three times in
the first ten miles, that it became evident to her that it would be much
too late to go to Windles that night, and she directed the driver to take
her instead to the "Blue Boar" in Windlehurst, where she arrived, tired
but thankful to have reached it at all, at about eleven o'clock.
At this point many, indeed most, women, having had a tiring journey,
would have gone to bed: but the familiar Hampshire air and the
knowledge that half an hour's walking would take her to her beloved
home acted on Mrs. Hignett like a restorative. One glimpse of Windles
she felt that she must have before she retired for the night, if only
to assure herself that it was still there. She had a cup of coffee and
a sandwich brought to her by the night-porter, whom she had roused from
sleep, for bedtime is early in Windlehurst, and then informed him that
she was going for a short walk and would ring when she returned.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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