Soldiers -- Fiction; War stories; World War, 1914-1918 -- Fiction
“But, look here, Andy,” said Henslowe nervously stroking his moustache.
“You care much more about your work than any abstract idea of asserting
your right of individual liberty. Even if you don't get caught.... I
think the chances of getting caught are mighty slim if you use your
head.... But even if you don't, you haven't enough money to live for
long over here, you haven't....”
“Don't you think I've thought of all that? I'm not crazy, you know. I've
figured up the balance perfectly sanely. The only thing is, you fellows
can't understand. Have you ever been in a labor battalion? Have you
ever had a man you'd been chatting with five minutes before deliberately
knock you down? Good God, you don't know what you are talking about,
you two.... I've got to be free, now. I don't care at what cost. Being
free's the only thing that matters.”
Andrews lay on his back talking towards the ceiling.
Henslowe was on his feet, striding nervously about the room.
“As if anyone was ever free,” he muttered.
“All right, quibble, quibble. You can argue anything away if you want
to. Of course, cowardice is the best policy, necessary for survival. The
man who's got most will to live is the most cowardly... go on.” Andrews's
voice was shrill and excited, breaking occasionally like a half-grown
boy's voice.
“Andy, what on earth's got hold of you?... God, I hate to go away this
way,” added Henslowe after a pause.
“I'll pull through all right, Henny. I'll probably come to see you in
Syria, disguised as an Arab sheik.” Andrews laughed excitedly.
“If I thought I'd do any good, I'd stay.... But there's nothing I can
do. Everybody's got to settle their own affairs, in their own damn fool
way. So long, Walters.”
Walters and Henslowe shook hands absently.
Henslowe came over to the bed and held out his hand to Andrews.
“Look, old man, you will be as careful as you can, won't you? And
write me care American Red Cross, Jerusalem. I'll be damned anxious,
honestly.”
“Don't you worry, we'll go travelling together yet,” said Andrews,
sitting up and taking Henslowe's hand.
They heard Henslowe's steps fade down the stairs and then ring for a
moment on the pavings of the courtyard.
Walters moved his chair over beside Andrews's bed.
“Now, look, let's have a man-to-man talk, Andrews. Even if you want to
ruin your life, you haven't a right to. There's your family, and haven't
you any patriotism?... Remember, there is such a thing as duty in the
world.”
Andrews sat up and said in a low, furious voice, pausing between each
word:
“I can't explain it.... But I shall never put a uniform on again.... So
for Christ's sake shut up.”
“All right, do what you goddam please; I'm through with you.”
Walters suddenly flashed into a rage. He began undressing silently.
Andrews lay a long while flat on his back in the bed, staring at the
ceiling, then he too undressed, put the light out, and got into bed.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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