When the working-man, in whose family a death has occurred, does not
happen to be a member of a burial club, he is still governed by their
example, and has to tax himself seriously to comply with the usages of
society, and give to his wife or child a respectable funeral. Where it
is the father of the family himself who has died, the case is still
harder. Perhaps all the savings of his life are spent in providing
mourning for his wife and children at his death. Such an expense, at
such a time, is ruinous, and altogether unjustifiable.
Does putting on garments of a certain colour constitute true mourning?
Is it not the heart and the affections that mourn, rather than the
outside raiment? Bingham, in speaking of the primitive Christians, says
that "they did not condemn the notion of going into a mourning habit for
the dead, nor yet much approve of it, but left it to all men's liberty
as an indifferent thing, rather commending those that either omitted it
wholly, or in short laid it aside again, as acting more according to the
bravery and philosophy of a Christian."
John Wesley directed, in his will, that six poor men should have twenty
shillings each for carrying his body to the grave,--"For," said he, "I
particularly desire that there may be no hearse, no coach, no
escutcheon, no pomp, except the tears of those that loved me, and are
following me to Abraham's bosom. I solemnly adjure my executors, in the
name of God, punctually to observe this."
It will be very difficult to alter the mourning customs of our time. We
may anxiously desire to do so, but the usual question will occur--"What
will people say?" "What will the world say?" We involuntarily shrink
back, and play the coward like our neighbours. Still, common sense,
repeatedly expressed, will have its influence; and, in course of time,
it cannot fail to modify the fashions of society The last act of Queen
Adelaide, by which she dispensed with the hired mummery of undertakers'
grief,--and the equally characteristic request of Sir Robert Peel on his
deathbed, that no ceremony, nor pomp, should attend his last
obsequies,--cannot fail to have their due effect upon the fashionable
world; and through them, the middle classes, who are so disposed to
imitate them in all things, will in course of time benefit by their
example. There is also, we believe, a growing disposition on the part of
the people at large to avoid the unmeaning displays we refer to; and it
only needs the repeated and decided expression of public opinion, to
secure a large measure of beneficial reform in this direction.
Societies have already been established in the United States, the
members of which undertake to disuse mourning themselves, and to
discountenance the use of it by others. It is only, perhaps, by
association and the power of numbers that this reform is to be
accomplished; for individuals here and there could scarcely be expected
to make way against the deeply-rooted prejudices of the community at
large.
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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