Through the school: The experiences of a mill boy in securing an educationBrown, Frederic Kenyon
Philosophy
Through the school: The experiences of a mill boy in securing an education
Brown, Frederic Kenyon
Education
One day I was sitting in the apparently deserted library, looking over
the new books which were always kept on a side shelf, at the entrance
to one of the alcoves, when I heard a heavy, most disconsolate sigh,
coming from a hidden corner in the rear of the room. The sigh was
followed by the rustling of book leaves. I continued my investigation
of the new books, but was once more interrupted by that same, prolonged
sighing. It was just such a sigh as Dante must have heard proceeding
from the lips of those unfortunate creatures who stood in neither hope
nor despair. I decided to investigate, and, for that purpose, went down
the alcove from which the sighing seemed to have come, and there, with
his back turned to me, seated at one of the reference tables, with
his head resting woefully on his spread out arms, sat Amos Tucker, an
upper-classman.
I hesitated to approach him, at first, and pretended that I had come
into the alcove for a book. Then again the sigh proceeded from the limp
heap at the table, and, throwing all restraint to the winds, I went to
the table, touched Amos on the shoulder, and said,
“Are you in trouble, Tucker?”
He raised his tearful, grey eyes to me, and said,
“They say I’m not fit to be a preacher!”
I sat down beside him, for from his manner I knew that he welcomed me
to be his confidant.
“Who says so? Any of the students?” I asked.
“No, it wouldn’t matter if it came from them: the church says so!”
“What church is that, Tucker?”
He sat up in his chair and replied,
“I have just started to preach, this year. I have been out for two
Sundays in a little place where they give me seven dollars, out of
which I have to pay a dollar and a half for expenses. It’s not that
I care a snap about the money, though, but I want a place to call my
parish. I feel that I ought to preach. Well, I’ve got a letter from the
committee this morning, telling me that they will have to get along
without me; that they cannot have me any longer for their minister.”
“What reasons do they offer?”
“That’s it!” he responded, with a catch in his voice, “they have had
the bravery to tell me the exact reason. It is this: they tell me--oh,
hadn’t you better read for yourself,” and he handed me the last page of
a letter, explaining,
“It’s all on that one page: all that you want to know.”
I read:
“You can never make a preacher, we feel--excuse us for telling you so
frankly--you have no voice, you do not read well, your grammar is poor,
your themes are not interesting. Your last Sunday morning’s talk on
‘Conscience’ was beyond our understanding. Several good supporters have
threatened to forego their subscriptions if we have you another Sunday.
Will you kindly suggest some one to come to us next Sunday and oblige,
yours in Christian sincerity, etc.”
“Blunt, isn’t it?” he half smiled.
“The idea of asking you to send them somebody, after that!” I gasped.
“Oh,” he sniffed, “it’s all in Christian sincerity, you know!”
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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