I kept that watch upon the stairs until long after the house was quiet.
I drew back into a recess once, when Murray Olivant and Dawkins went
roaring up to their respective rooms; and again when presently Lucas
Savell fumbled his trembling way up to his particular quarters. Even
after that there was a great deal of noise for a time, because Dawkins
and Olivant appeared to take a particular delight in shouting to each
other from one room to the other as they undressed.
But presently even they were quiet, and the dreary old house seemed to
sink deeper and deeper into the shadows of the night. Keeping my lonely
watch there, I dreamed of all that had happened in the years that were
dead; thought chiefly, too, of my own utter helplessness now. I was to
have been strong and purposeful; I was to have helped those who, like
myself in an earlier time, were helpless; I laughed bitterly to think
how weak I was, and how little I could do. I tried to tell myself what
my years were, and how I ought to be strong and lusty; and then I
remembered that my hair was grey, and my face shrunken and old, and my
body weak. I had thought that I could cope with the powers of position
and strength and riches; and I could do nothing.
Thinking I heard a noise above, I determined at last that I would not go
to bed yet; the girl seemed so absolutely alone in that great house. I
knew the room in which she slept, and I presently crept up there, and
lay down across her doorway, to snatch some sleep in that fashion. Even
as I fell asleep I smiled to think that it might have been the old
Barbara I was guarding, and not this new one, after all.
I awoke with a light on my face, and the consciousness that some one was
looking down at me. I started up in a sitting posture, only half awake,
and saw that the door of the room was open, and that Barbara stood
there, with a candle in her hand, bending over me. Our faces were very
close together when she spoke in a surprised whisper--
"Tinman! What are you doing there?"
"I did not mean that you should be disturbed," I said. "I only wanted to
feel that you were safe."
"Dear kind Tinman!" she whispered, as the tears gathered in her eyes. "I
have not slept at all; I have lain awake--thinking. You moved in your
sleep, I think, and brushed against the door, and I wondered what it
was. Come inside a moment."
She spoke in the faintest whisper, stopping every now and then to listen
intently. I got slowly to my feet, and went just inside the door of the
room; she closed the door, and stood there with the candle in her hand,
looking at me. I remember that she looked very frail and young, with her
hair falling about her shoulders.
"What am I to do, Tinman?" she asked.
I shook my head. "Indeed, I don't know," I replied. "Life is always so
hard, and there are so many to make it harder for us. You did not quite
trust me to-day when I spoke to you," I added regretfully, "or I might
be able to speak to you more frankly."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
Reviews
Reviews
No reviews yet
Be the first to share your thoughts on this work.
Elsewhere in the archive
Join the Discussion
Join the discussion
Sign in to leave a comment or review.
Sign InorCreate an account