She answered, with emotion, "O thou good, pure spirit! thou hast never
distressed me, thou hast ever comforted, guided, made me happy and
holy,--a phantom is it, Albano? It even preserves me against all
phantoms of terror, against all ghostly fear, because it is always about
me. Why, if it is only a phantom, does it never appear to me in my
dreams?[176] Why comes it not when I will? But it comes only in weighty
cases; then I consult and obey it very willingly. It has already to-day,
Albano," she added, in a lower and fainter tone, "twice appeared to me
on the way, when I heard the inner music, and previously in the
thunder-house, when the sun went down, and has affectionately answered
me."
"And what says it, heavenly one?" asked Albano, innocently. "I saw it
only on the way, and asked no question," replied the childlike one,
blushing; and here, all at once, her holy soul stood unconsciously
without a veil before him; for she had, in the thunder-house, received
from the invisible Caroline the yes to her love; because that being was
her own creation, and this a suggestion of her own. Yes indeed, heavenly
one! thou standest before the mirror with the virgin's veil over thy
form, and when thy image softly raises its own, thou fanciest thyself
still covered!
No word can express Albano's veneration for such a sanctified heart,
which dreamed into such distinctness glorified beings; whose golden
flowers only grew the higher over the thought of death, as earthly ones
do in churchyards over the reality; which, simultaneously with his own,
invisible hands had drawn into two similar dreams;[177] to which one was
ashamed to give common truths for its holy errors. "Thou art from
heaven," he said, inspired, and his joy became the pearl melted in the
eye which quenches the thirst of the human heart; "therefore thou
wouldst go back thither!" "O, I consecrate to thee, my friend," said
she, smilingly weeping, and pressed his hand to her pure heart, "the
whole little life which I have, every hour to the last, and I will,
meanwhile, prepare thee for everything which God sends."
Public-domain text, read in full here on John Shaqi.
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